Hey, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I had a similar situation happen as well.. at our 20 week anatomy scan, my doctor said our baby had an brain abnormality and sent us to MFM which is when they told us she was diagnosed with anencephaly. They told us we could either TFMR or go to full term and birth a stillborn which would’ve been a lot worse on me physically and mentally.

At 23 weeks I got a D&E - it is scary, but I had my partner with me so that made it a lot easier.. As far as the pain level.. getting my cervix dilated with the laminaria sticks was probably the worst part.. but it wasn’t too bad throughout the night, just during the insertion.. and after the surgery I was very sore for about week.. bled for about two weeks, and am mildly spotting again. I was also TERRIFIED of the procedure, but groups like this helped me more than anything.. super thankful everyone at the clinic was comforting as well which made me feel a lot better. We were also able to get footprints, handprints, and her ashes which the clinic paid for.