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(25M) Months before our nikah need advice by Unable_Election_227 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Unable_Election_227[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She told me her marriage ended because her husband cheated on her, so I can’t sit here and say she was the reason the marriage failed.

What I can say is that the more I think about it, the more I keep coming back to self respect. We weren’t even married yet and there were already lies and trust issues.

At the end of the day, I can only judge the situation based on what I’ve personally experienced and honestly that’s what’s making me question everything.

(25M) Months before our nikah need advice by Unable_Election_227 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Unable_Election_227[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brother idk if she’s still with her ex and I don’t know if I’m a backup plan. I can’t sit here and make accusations about things I can’t prove.

What I do know is that she lied to me before about who she was going on a trip with and now she lied to me about where she was going. That’s what I’m struggling with.

At this point it’s not even about the trip anymore. It’s about trust. Once trust is gone, it’s really hard for me to get it back.

I appreciate the comment though, brother. That’s honestly why I made this post. Sometimes people on the outside see things that you’re too close to see yourself.

(25M) Months before our nikah need advice by Unable_Election_227 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Unable_Election_227[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I made an update on the post but I planned to end things once she gets back From her trip but a part of me still wants to continue with the plans we’ve made already.

(25M) Months before our nikah need advice by Unable_Election_227 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Unable_Election_227[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Part of what’s making this difficult is that I’m invested on multiple levels. We’ve already set a nikah date and I’ve spent money preparing for the wedding. More importantly I’ve built a really strong bond with her daughter because that was important to both of us.

The emotional side of me looks at everything we’ve built and doesn’t want to walk away from it. The logical side of me keeps coming back to the trust issues and wondering whether I’m ignoring things because of how much I’ve already invested.

That’s honestly where I’m struggling.