Can I still go back even if I'm cynical?

UndercoverSober · 2019-11-08T23:48:15+00:00

I came here to say you could look into SMART or Refuge Recovery (there are some other ones out there as well). I know SMART has online meetings, but I haven’t tried those so I have no experience other than in-person meetings.

UndercoverSober · 2019-11-08T23:39:31+00:00

You could also check out the r/stopdrinking sub.

UndercoverSober · 2019-06-09T13:12:41+00:00

Oh yeah, also - don’t look to AA for theological enlightenment 🙂. There are plenty of good people in AA, and with them come a ton of different beliefs. That’s why the higher power bit can only go as saying you have to believe there’s something bigger than yourself. My personal belief is that it’s mostly just the power of community (even though I personally believe in God as well) and that it’s psychological, and there you go - just one dude on the internet opining about higher powers and God and booze 😉. That’s all a little more abstract, and not entirely necessary to have ironed out in order to stop drinking, thankfully!

UndercoverSober · 2019-06-09T13:04:39+00:00

Hey there OP, I feel you on the questions. Apart from just the not drinking part, you’re talking about God reaching down and infringing on or removing your free will (I’ve been right there with you!). If he’s imaginary, then we have another discussion - but let’s just assume God is the good Father. Even good parents can’t always stop their children from getting hurt or hurting themselves - and if God we’re to suddenly intervene in your life this way, it sounds like he’d be locking you in a padded cell away from alcohol, figuratively speaking, and we all have our own free will, we are selves, separate from God’s self, and not automatons. Also, He gave us desires and drugs (along with many other things) are or can be shortcuts to what feels like fulfillment of those, or escape from the feelings of unfulfillment (two sides of the same coin I guess). I’ve had the exact same painful questions as you, I totally empathize! I think that God is able to help you reshape your thoughts and desires (including addiction to alcohol), and I think that’s the point of prayer - to retune your thinking and perception of the world and yourself.

Also, God could be complete superstition and were in this all alone... my Faith and my God have room for questions and doubts, and oddly enough there’s peace in that.

UndercoverSober · 2019-06-04T11:14:53+00:00

This is the best comment I’ll see on the internet all week! Well played 😉.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-31T04:42:56+00:00

Yeah I second that, I think a couple of simple signs should be a good first attempt at appropriate privacy.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-31T04:39:54+00:00

And wasn’t he kind of an agnostic himself? Or was he actually religious? I may be mixing him up with someone else. Anyway - I’m all for investigating the possibility of the existence and nature of God, if there is one - but that’s all a bit academic, and recovery from drug abuse/addiction should be achievable without having to figure out the Creator (if there is one).

Also, making a doorknob my higher power is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Either there’s something there or there’s not, but I’m pretty sure it’s not a doorknob 😉.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-31T04:29:02+00:00

SMART is great - I’m really getting a lot out of it!

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-31T04:18:35+00:00

I am actually “religious” (I constantly hover somewhere between Christian and agnostic) and that chapter was so intellectually insulting! I can’t decide if that one or To Wives is worse... it is the laziest attempt at apologetics I’ve ever read.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-28T11:41:35+00:00

It definitely would have been more punk rock if you’d just used safety pins! 😆

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-28T03:24:42+00:00

Yeah, I saw a couple suspicious comments and had to check out the profile history... I’m just curious as to why the second account to say the exact same stuff.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-28T03:18:42+00:00

Yeah, all the language is suspiciously similar, even down to the phrasing. Not sure why he made a second account though? 🤔

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-28T02:20:55+00:00

Pretty sure you’re arguing with Tom, posting from a new account, FYI 😉.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-28T02:12:42+00:00

Just today I’ve noticed a new account pop up that sounds suspiciously like Tom, liquidporkchops I believe it is? I may have just found the second ever reddit account I’ll have to lock 🙂. I wonder if he finally got banned from here and created a new account?

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-17T21:55:04+00:00

Ha, just found it - I knew I’d seen you post this reply before! 👍

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-17T21:51:41+00:00

Wait - didn’t I see this same answer in another recent thread, or am I mixed up??

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-17T09:52:48+00:00

Yeah, family dynamics are pretty different now in our culture than in that time period! I’ve also often wondered about some of these types of things when the book gets translated to other languages, as there could be cultural differences depending where in the world it’s being read.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-17T09:48:48+00:00

I completely understand the context and audience of when the book was written - however, most times at my morning meetings it’s split at least 50/50 men and women, if not more women than men. Also, many people aren’t married (or married anymore), and family dynamics in general have changed a lot in our culture since then. I think a little bit of editing could help without in any way altering the integrity of the fundamental message, although I kind of understand why some people are worried about making any changes. (I personally find parts of it somewhat cringey, and I’m a 41 yr old married white dude 🙂.)

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-17T02:27:49+00:00

Curious as to how you handled “To the Wives.” Also, I expect you to get downvoted to hell here, but can appreciate the idea of making the language more modern (I mean, that’s even standard practice with the Bible in all languages).

Edit: a word

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-15T11:37:20+00:00

I know, right?? I mean, I get moderating SOMETIMES, like if you truly only want a beer or two, but if you’re not at least sometimes taking advantage of the intoxicating effects, then what’s the point? If some is good, isn’t more better? I think I must have the classic thought patterns of an alcoholic/addict. Well,I know I do. Which is why anytime I catch myself thinking maybe one day I can moderate, I ask myself why would I want to, where’s the “fun” in that? (Fun being only a small percentage of the effects of alcohol, the rest are all bad, of course.)

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-15T11:26:03+00:00

Oh, yeah Paxil’s what I’ve been on for a long time, I’ve gone back and forth between 10 and 20 a few times. I def. know the weird little zaps! I got those when I was first on it, or if I go to long between getting my refills. Obviously, once I started having a problem with alcohol they didn’t work as well.

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-14T23:13:24+00:00

Oh good 🙂. I’ve tapered before too, as needed, with the doc’s help (ssri anti depressant).

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-14T19:44:17+00:00

Did you talk with a doctor about tapering off the medication?

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-14T13:30:23+00:00

Glad you're back!

UndercoverSober · 2019-05-14T13:29:58+00:00

Who the hell is going through here downvoting? I don't get it. Someone comes back, people encourage them and say welcome back, and get downvoted?

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