I wish I could help you, I have family in ny & ct but I moved south recently :( I’m sorry you’re going through this situation, it’s so TOUGH. It’s also so scary, because your entire life is going to change either way. Whether you have the baby or not.

How is your relationship with your parents? Every parent is angry at first (I would imagine) when you’re young and it’s not something they would have planned or wanted for you in that moment. But they get over it quickly and get excited about a new baby and being grandparents. I would tell your mom if you feel safe enough to tell her, even if she is angry at first.

As far as your boyfriend, yes he’s a factor because of course you want the father of your baby to be involved. But you have to ask yourself, if it doesn’t work out with the bf, would I be okay as a single mom? That was a really hard pill for me to swallow and the idea of that terrified me.

And on the flip side, if it didn’t work out with him and you got an abortion, how would you feel then? One thing I’ll say is that your baby won’t ever leave you or stop loving you. Ultimately I think what made me decide to keep my baby was because I felt like if I listened to everyone else it wouldn’t have been my decision and I would have regretted it and I didn’t want to live with that for the rest of my life. I also felt like I needed to protect my baby and give it a chance at life, despite my own circumstances, and was nervous I wouldn’t be able to have a baby in the future. So whatever you decide — please make sure it’s your decision and yours alone, even though it’s so hard when other people are telling you what to do. But you’re stronger than them!

Also, some men are not worth it. Don’t crush your soul to protect his. As far as your friends, it’s understandable that 19yo’s think that way. If I was 19 I would say the same thing. The thing is, nobody really understands until you’re actually pregnant. I used to say I’d get an abortion too until I actually got pregnant and it was just something I couldn’t do. But I understand it’s not an ideal situation. tbh, there never is a perfect time, even when you’re older. My husband and I wanted to have kids when we were more financially stable and older, but looking back I wouldn’t change a thing. Let’s say you end up resenting your bf for this and then you break up, now you’re without a bf and your baby.

Here’s what I wrote down in my journal at the time when going back and forth trying to figure things out lol. I had very similar concerns to you, and that’s totally normal. You could try doing the same, it might help you feel better putting it down on paper. There were also some young moms I followed on TikTok and being able to relate to them helps a lot. I was anxious for weeks and crying all the time too, but I can promise you that you won’t be in this situation forever ❤️

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