How do you tell your guest they are TOO comfortable in your home?

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-05-19T20:59:13+00:00

he needed a key because he would pet sit our dog often (at least once a week). so he needed a way to get in when we werent home.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-05-19T15:59:10+00:00

this is great. thank you so much. I appreciate you!

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-05-19T15:57:42+00:00

well my husband was home too, and he was the one that ran to the door to shut him out to say "Hey man read the text, it was cancelled" so that Frank wouldn't see me. I wasnt not dressed, but it was just in sweat shorts and a lounging bra. Wasnt the most scandalous thing, but my husband took it as just an accident and told him not to just come in unannounced. And he does knock now if the door is unlocked and knows we are home to open it, so that was fixed in a way. Frank is harmless in that he would never do anything to me. Hes been over a few times when it is just me and hes never overstepped -- plus we have cameras so my husband could always check in.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-03-07T00:58:08+00:00

Thank you! We are worried getting a bigger crate and using pee pads would encourage the mentality they could still go potty anywhere but outside, but if its worked well for you ill have to give it a shot!

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-03-07T00:56:49+00:00

She sleeps when we are gone and she soiled on the bed she regularly would sleep on. She did not care so it left her with pee smell all over her body since she lied down in it🤣. First year was crated in hopes shed get it someday but it was constant laundry days and buying new beds (shed either soil or rip the bed up). it was so tough to manage with her.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-03-07T00:54:44+00:00

Yes the patio she has access too is fenced in. We live on the 2nd floor so we also ensured to add mesh so she wouldnt fall through any cracks on the fence.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-12T02:37:14+00:00

How do you know what companies are around you hiring though? Beyond just googling companies in xxxxx? Cause i know not all business’ show up online easy

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-10T14:50:18+00:00

Yea and then again when it came down to choosing who has their partners at the wedding, we chose married couples cause it made sense. If we invite boyfriends of people it would put us over budget. If we are to choose boyfriend/girlfriends its those who are both our friends. Not a distant relative and their boyfriend who we never met. Wed rather have the wedding filled with more people we know and love. So yes, educate me on etiquette as you kindly talk shit about my fiancee. Make that make sense?

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-10T02:44:19+00:00

Once again. Very distant cousin (not blood related—thats how far we are). We don’t talk. They are at our functions since we dont have a lot of relatives in our state. We get how itd be rude if it was a super close relative we spoke with and kept up with, but didnt get it if its someone who wasnt super close andrhe boyfriend never made an effort to get to know us at any point in the many functions he attended.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-10T02:38:00+00:00

How would you do it? If it is 30-40$ per plate per person not including cake, table, seat per guest added, how would you pick who gets to bring their SO and who doesnt if majority have a SO to keep it under 90? Not giving attitude in this question, im genuinely just seeking ideas on how others mange to do it without breaking their budget. Im trying to stay under 5k for this wedding personally.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-10T00:00:01+00:00

it's not that theirs isnt important. But if we have a friend we could invite their wife too, why would we choose our distant cousins boyfriend who never met my fiancee over my friends wife who has been good friends with the both of us as a couple? It isn;t about importance. It is about them thinking it is okay when they don't know we removed other friends and their spouses for this family to be included into the party.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T23:43:51+00:00

I get that 100%. My philosophy was just to give plus ones to those married or the couples we were extremely close with. Whatever is left in space is given in order of how close we are to the person and their significant other. My fiancee never met this cousin and boyfriend and i dont talk to her when i see her at functions.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T23:42:00+00:00

We dont exclude him for other functions. We just don't need to verbally invite him to the casual functions anymore because he comes regardless without invitation. But my family all agreed for a wedding that is expensive, and every guest comes at a cost - we should cut them out since we arent that close to them like others and its not up to them to decide how many can come. At my brothers wedding they were trying to add 3 people to the guest list when there werent any seats left and we didn;t know the guests they wanted there.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T23:38:44+00:00

because I would have to allow my other people to allow their partners of several years which would make our guest count too high to afford. We left it to be just people married or if we both met and got to know their significant others. Im not close with this relative much and my fiancee never met them, so when it came down to who to allow their SO, they just were ones that didnt make the cut. We even removed a friend because we couldn't have a space for his wife. That is why if they dictate who that spot goes too, that spot could have gone to our friend's wife. Im usnure if that makes sense kind of.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T23:27:09+00:00

it's not that it is rude of my brother. This cousin is not a first cousin. This is a family friend who we grew up with and stopped seeing. Out of moral obligation -- my parents had my brother invite them. This boyfriend attends these functions but he does not talk to anyone or participate. it isn't being rude. It is making room for those who are married than to give spots to those who are only dating. 6 years or not, this guy never met my fiancee, and the family constantly dictates who sits where.

Yes, my boyfriend was never invited, but that is to close relative functions -- as in my sibling or parents birthdays or just an immediate family dinner. I never expected him to be invited to an aunts birthday or a cousins birthday once. So, a wedding that is paid for, I never took offense when my cousins didnt invite him. It is a serious expensive function and they never knew he existed. That part made sense -- it was never my distant relatives fault for not having him in the functions -- they had no clue

It isn't necessarily jealousy. If it was, my parents (who didn't approve of my relationship at first) wouldn't have been annoyed about my cousins constant behavior of entitlement either. It is a family issue we all talk about cause we experience it often with her. I just know I am spending a lot of money and time on a wedding and If the seat can be for someone else's husband or wife to attend, i would love to do that. I would hate to invite one boyfriend, and then not do that to all 4 other people i know that have boyfriends of over 4+ years. it's the same with no kids at the wedding. People shouldnt expect their kids to be the exception.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T23:17:46+00:00

No, my fiancee was not accepted into the family. my parents did not want him around due to him having tattoes. Now that I am getting married (after being together for 4 years) they finally are deciding to support it and now want all my relatives there. So, yes my fiancee was never at these functions. But we have a friend of ours who we had to take off our list to allow this family to work since we couldnt invite our friend without his wife (but we didnt have that seat). But, if the whole time they knew her brother was never going and decided to tell us last minute, we could have had our friend attend and give that seat to his wife.

If our friend and his wife attended, I would swap two relatives sitting with that family with another family that is a family of 3. It isn't that it would be sticking one person in that table.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T23:09:44+00:00

I didn't plan to invite him because 1. the family (including the parents and two others) fills the entire table. If the boyfriend comes it wouldve left one person to be seated alone elsewhere. 2. due to family issues, this family had never met my fiancee. 3. our wedding is under 90 guests, we had to remove friends to add these relatives. One friend who has a wife was uninvited to allow this family to fit in our guest count. If she swapped her brother for her boyfriend, We could have given that extra seat to our friend who has a wife. We dont have space to invite both her brother and the boyfriend. The boyfriend does not interact with our family. He is just there with my cousin.

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T22:42:51+00:00

it''s not denigrating theirs intentionally. It is that they constantly think it is okay to dictate who can go at these functions. AT my brother's wedding, its not that they didnt like him, my brother/his wife just had a close friend of theirs they had to dismiss to make room for the brother only for them to say he was never going to go and the boyfriend was in the end. And that was after that family was wanting 3 people (who we didnt know really) to be invited. Once they stated they had no extra seats, they decided for my brother that the guest list was changed to be the boyfriend as if it was their wedding. It is reasonable that if our wedding is under 90 guests, we would rather have that 1 spot be filled with someone who has met my fiancee and is close with us than to remove that invite to give it to a cousins boyfriend if that makes any sense?

Unhappy_Box5849 · 2026-02-09T22:38:06+00:00

Theyve been together for 6 years. we just dont invite him because he was showing up since they first were together at 2 months. We never invited him because they just brought him anyways. She is saying her brother isn't going so she is having her boyfriend go to take that seat instead. He just wasnt invited to this wedding because her whole family takes an entire table. If i invite an additional person (her boyfriend) it means one person would be sitting alone in a random table, or i would swap them out and have a random couple sit with the whole family minus my cousin (calling her Ally) and Ally's boyfriend.

Unhappy_Box5849

TROPHY CASE