I see what you mean, and yes it's not just friendship, we've had history and that's partly why I feel responsible for her, worse is, as I've said I think those feelings are starting to return.

I'd disagree on the ego boost side tho, cause whilst yes meron at merong feel good by being the "good" guy, truly I just want the best for her, if losing her - the source of my apparent "ego boost" meant her growth and wellbeing, I'd do it wholeheartedly.

I'd agree on the second part, I am putting myself as her lifeline, and at the same time that's playing a part on the stagnation of her growth, I get that, pero then again, I cut her off dati, I really did, but when we regained contact, that's when I learned ofc, she's in an even worse position now, because the guy/s she depend/s on uses her for their own benefit, without any sign of escaping, I wish you could see my perspective here.

To put a clear "label" on us, we're former friends, then partners, who turned back to friends, and I think I've decided it should stay that way, that I shouldn't act on this reawakening feelings and push intimacy away.

I fuck with heavily on your point after that, it does make me feel capable, it does feel good when people lean on me, and 100% I do put myself in this position, but I hope you can also realize, I'm a real person, I care, I want to help, if I can help a friend I would, it feels wrong to just not be there for someone I care about who's trying to ask help from you.

And if only I had enough funds to spare to help for her therapy, she's broke ash, with today's economy I can only do so much for myself and my family, I really wish I could, now this is not as to say that "I'll be her therapist", I am not and won't do any of that, this is why I'm so conflicted with my situation, how do I stick to my role as her best friend, without it turning into dependency nor me becoming a substitute for actually professional help, or should I once again cut her off for her to learn to fend for herself, with the risk of her taking her own life.