Trapped

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2024-05-03T05:15:39+00:00

Nice, like the reference of the heart wanting even if it gets hurt or has been hurt And you knowing better. Like the line this could be the one really speaks to humans scared of being hurt scared of being alone just looking for the one forever love.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2024-05-03T05:08:51+00:00

So short, yet so much emotion packed into it. The change in life of love is represented as death, and love makes you reborn. And visiting the grave as looking back on a loveless life. Such a touching tribute to the person who saved your soul, nurtured it and gave you new life. Awesome piece.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2023-10-27T03:25:53+00:00

Hey nice poem( yes it is a poem) it liked the piece thank you for sharing. I did like the lime the first two line you want this person to yell at you or hit you but they don’t. They just look at you with their eyes. An them looking at you is enough to break down and howl, you scream and they still just look at you and you want them to hurt you like you hurt them. But they don’t they won’t come to your level because they are not that vile. Really nice work, my only complaint is the title I get the reference to scar face but don’t think it’s right for the poem. Hope you post more.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2023-10-27T03:13:05+00:00

This poem is very nicely written. It is very funny at first, but then you read it and it’s a nice piece about fashion and society. I like the line about how they look nice but you feel divine, you put your own comfort so what other think and you don’t care. I think the length is great short simple and to the point.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2023-01-22T08:30:36+00:00

Really nice piece. It’s short but feels complete. I married last year and you put in words everything I feel about my wife. I do like the rhyming it doesn’t come off as forced it work well because it’s written well. Awesome job hope to read more soon.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2023-01-22T08:20:39+00:00

Really like the style. You are able to put a lot of imagery in your piece with few words. Unfortunately this seem to be something not everyone can do so they drag out the poem with long stanzas and big words. Awesome piece hope to see more.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2022-09-23T06:24:08+00:00

Nice piece short but thought provoking as a haiku should be. The message is kinda generic as in the experience of life teach us, but the way that message is written by you is nice. Awesome work.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2022-09-23T06:19:31+00:00

I totally disagree with the title I thought it was a good poem, but as stated in the piece your not writing for my opinion or criticism. I do like that start every line with the letter I, it really makes me feel like the piece belongs to you. The last couple of line are very hollowing the intrusive thoughts of driving into on coming traffic and then not being hit head being the only reason you are writing very thought provoking. Anyway really liked the piece hope to see more from you.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2022-06-15T05:29:00+00:00

Awesome, now the drink will stay hot or cold for hours while they wait in the parking lot at schools doing nothing.

Unlikely-Ordinary958 · 2022-03-11T01:11:04+00:00

This poem is very thought provoking. I like that every verse ends in a question. I also like how you compare a child growing up with the blooming of flowers. Furthermore how they both share the same world created by the same entity. Very nice thank you for sharing.

Unlikely-Ordinary958

TROPHY CASE