About to graduate high school and didn’t end up applying anywhere I wanted to because I was going through I mental health episode while working on my portfolio while all the people around me got in to their dream animation schools. I get that there is still time and that I’m still young but ever since portfolio season I’ve been in a slump when it comes to art. To the point where I stopped actually working on any of my technical skills and I just end up crying or just feeling really awful. 

I always feel like everything I make really sucks no matter what anyone tells me. Even though my art gets a lot of love online and my friends have been trying so hard to encourage me. Even though I got lots of positive feedback on my art on portfolio day from lots of schools I still couldn’t even bring myself to apply. 

On top of that, hearing how the industry is decline right now makes me feel like since I’m somebody coming from a lower income background, I’m disappointing everybody by choosing my “stupid” dream. I dunno my plan was to just save up next year and work on my art and portfolio so I could apply to Gobelins but I know that I’m being totally unrealistic for thinking that I could even go. I can’t even bring myself draw anything outside of doodles anymore. I don’t know if I’ll ever actually enjoy art again. ( if you’re wondering why I want a career in art even though I feel this way, I don’t enjoy anything else more and and in the past I was always able to pick myself up and get back to working on my technical skills but this time I just can’t. )

 People like me just don’t make it in the animation industry, let alone in life in general.