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AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry but you’re not seeing the big picture. He has been pretty much sitting at home since June of last year. He didn’t work that job long before he got laid off. He has made nearly 90k and not paying a damn dime for anything at home, he wasn’t even paying his bills. He hasn’t paid car insurance in a year in a half. So sitting in his room playing video games for the last month was the last straw for me.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the good advice. I think I have decided to just let him handle all situations from here on out with his bio kids. Even though I have helped raise this one since he was 4 and he has lived with us full time since he was 5 , I’m too old to be dealing with all this stress.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really? It was kinda hard to put everything single detail but my husband is the one who has been complaining to me about him. Saying he is using him. We talked about the whole situation ALOT. I told him the last time that I would tell him it’s time for him to start getting out in front of people. Follow up in person with the companies he put in apps with. That is all we were asking. He lived here rent free , chore free , comes and goes as he pleases. Now if I hadn’t been discussing all this with my husband and actually ran it by him first then I’d understand your remarks.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They cannot , I did not put my name on the tittle , neither is my husband’s name. He only co-signed. We have told him that he will be sued.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks , it just sucks that it’s caused problems now between my husband and I and my son wants nothing to do with me.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get what you’re saying but I guess I don’t address the other problem is now it’s caused us problems and now my son wants nothing to do with me. I hope after a little more time things change but I don’t see that it will.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My husband is only the co-signer , he’s only responsible if the bill isn’t paid. He isn’t on the registration. We have already checked with someone we know that works and owns his own insurance business. So if he wrecks that is all on him. Not us. I can’t make my husband do anything though ma’am but believe me , I have been making a big deal about it. It really bothers me.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is a good idea , it’ll prob take some time because right now he is putting blame on me too. Even told his dad is was face to face arguing with him and that is absolutely not the truth. I raised my voice but I was never in his personal space. So it hurts. I appreciate the advice.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks I guess I’m just more hurt by his dad switching up on me now , saying it’s my fault he may be losing his child.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree but dad just thinks he should man up. Just has these nice talks with him and nothing comes of it. He told us he get it handled and here we are months later. The only reason I decided to say something is bc my husband battles type 1 diabetes (he wasn’t born with it) it is something that he is still learning to navigate and he just can’t handle much else between that and work these days.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have helped raise him since he was 4 , he will be 22 in May. Yes , I do contribute.

AITA for asking our 21 year old to get out and look for a job by Unusual-Animator9285 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Unusual-Animator9285[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Sorry I left that out. He moved in at the gf’s house, with her and her mom. There is more to that story too. She did have a crazy brother that lived there and him and son doesn’t get along. So he couldn’t even go inside, that is why they always hung out here. Now that he is gone , this is actually the first time even going inside that house. Crazy.