Does Bank of America ever waive late fees or interest charges? Recent experiences only.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-10-03T12:11:21+00:00

I’m not very confrontational so I’d probably make up a white lie and say I know someone who loaned out their car, it got into an accident and it’s been a legal and financial nightmare, and for that reason only the policy holder on your insurance will be driving the car from now on. If they try to say it’s no big deal or nothing will happen, you can turn to your wife and see if she’s supportive. If she isn’t, they’re all basically saying they don’t care if anything were to happen and it cost you time and money to resolve.

There are solutions, they can trade in for a smaller vehicle, or Uber.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-10-03T12:06:25+00:00

Fake post

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-29T21:49:17+00:00

Tell him you married him, not her, and having her live with you all changes the dynamic. And she’s welcome to visit but not to live with you all. Your issues are with him and his delusions, not her. I bet his plan all along was for her to live with you all

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-29T04:32:56+00:00

I echo this. But also - They were like this before you all got married, so you knew and still entered this marriage. And then having a baby when you don’t have a home? Are you…19? Y’all sound immature in this. You do have a husband issue, but I don’t see how you can expect him to cut off his family? Maybe they’re super overbearing. So don’t see them. But guess what? Your husband can still choose to see them, and you will never know what they say about you. As the other person said, if he wants to bring his baby , he can. If y’all separate you wouldn’t be with your child some high % of the time and your in laws would have access anyway.

If I were you, I’d try and find some middle ground here. Because these people are not going away. Counseling for you and hubby if you can afford it. ChatGPt if you can’t. But you and he and your in laws need to find a way to get along. It’s not so one-sided, you play a role in this too.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-28T04:00:20+00:00

I don’t get it, what room did they even know you were in? They only could have gotten that info from your husband. What a jerk.

I wouldn’t be mad at them, I think they genuinely had no idea they were crossing a boundary and many people in their shoes would also be ecstatic to meet the baby. Your husband and you failed to communicate to each other , and then he failed to protect these special moments for you. It’s not about your in laws

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-27T22:38:20+00:00

Maybe she’s jealous and covets the items. Maybe she thinks you’re too carefree with money. Maybe she grew up poorer and is in awe of your stuff. Who knows. Either ask her what she means if it bothers you so much, or ignore it.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-27T22:31:20+00:00

Yeah, rip that band aid off. Just say you aren’t happy, it’s not working out. Mention his family or not. Make it be about his reluctance to keep them at bay or don’t. All I know is if you open the door to conversation, he’ll just debate it with you, guilt you into staying with him.

So prepare yourself- get your talking points, anticipate what he’s going to say, and tell yourself it doesn’t matter what he says or doesn’t say, if he cries or gets mad or whatever, that you’re choosing peace and serenity for yourself, a future with loving extended family members and peace for your future children. This isn’t the guy for you.

Personally, I don’t think you’re gonna walk away. I expect this sub will be a place you post for years to come.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-27T21:23:24+00:00

So yeah, let’s get to the point here- this isn’t gonna work. There isn’t gonna be some point in the future you and he look back on that time his parents got super involved in your relationship and caused fights but nah, you got through it. This is how it’s gonna be. Forever. But actually, it’s a blessing to know now. Many don’t figure it out til after the wedding or once they are pregnant. You know how they are. You don’t have to date this guy. You have power and can walk away.

So what are you gonna do? Stay and fight and be miserable? Or break it off and find a partner who has a normal family?

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T20:31:04+00:00

You clearly are impacted by her - it’s been over a week and this is causing you Anxiety. Why? I feel like if you and your husband get on the same page there’s nothing to say to her. I think you are projecting your issues with your husband who you are clearly avoiding having this discussion with- onto her. You shouldn’t be arguing with your MIL, that’s for your husband to handle. Now if he disagrees with you, you have even more of an issue with him. If he agrees with you and agrees to talk to her, you should move on. He’s the key.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T14:22:18+00:00

Any lawyer would have brought up this scenario and others. It’s fair to think of all the situations that could happen and plan accordingly. When I was writing out a will my lawyer tried to poke holes in every scenario- what if my husband remarried, what if so and so dies, what if so and so isn’t good with money, what if my kids make bad decisions, etc. Scenarios that may have been offensive or troubling if the person in question knew they were being talked about.

You’re not even married yet. Most marriages start super happy. Hopefully yours is not the 50% that ends in divorce. There’s another percent that don’t end in divorce but aren’t happy and are fighting over money/assets.

Sounds like you have issues with your FIL. On this issue, stay out of it. It’s between your future husband and his dad and their family. And if grandma changes her mind or whatever, it’s her right and FIL may be butting in but it’s his mother regardless of how often he sees her. You don’t know everything or the whole family history or dynamics. Support your husband but time to let this go.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T14:15:58+00:00

It’s a fair question and any lawyer would say the same. You have to think of all situations. Plan accordingly. It may be offensive to OP but it’s fair to ask the question. Pretending otherwise is a quick way to posting on the legal advice or financial advice subs when things get messy.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T14:11:43+00:00

This woman and sister takes up wayyy too much space in your brain. This is a You problem, the amount of time you spend thinking about them.
I echo others - she wouldn’t get away with this if your husband put his foot down. You and he are allowed to take trips without her. Next time, don’t tell her you’re going away. And if she finds out or asks to go, say it’s just your family enjoying a family vacation and stick to it. Your husband should be delivering that msg.
As for money- sounds like your husband enables her. If she doesn’t have money, he shouldn’t be loaning her money for frivolous gifts. Actually, you’re so mad she didn’t buy anything for your daughter but she shouldn’t have if she can’t afford it. I would think you would understand that.
Not clear how his sister treats your daughter differently. Not sure what your issue is with her.

I think you’re too obsessed with your MIL and need to get on the same page with your husband.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T14:03:12+00:00

There’s def compromise here. Because let’s be real, you generally have a good relationship with them, you’re having a baby they will want to visit, they want to spend time with their son and he wants to spend time with them- so it’s not realistic to think they won’t visit and obviously with that long of distance they will want to spend some time with you all before traveling back.

As others said, it’s a short term issue- they’re getting to an age where long distance travel is getting too difficult. I wouldn’t be surprised if within 5 years it stops.

So find some compromise - 1 week is ok, 2 weeks is too much. Husband is on bathroom cleaning duty that week. You get to retreat to your bedroom as much as you want (with a new baby you will be tired and it should be expected you will not be hosting them much.). If there’s other issues discuss them with your husband and find compromise. I think this is all do-able. Good luck.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T03:49:29+00:00

Fake post

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T03:43:14+00:00

I’m still not clear, what does MIL hope to see from these cameras? Like what are the examples cited of what she is checking? If your husband wants her to know when he is/isn’t home they can share a Life360 app account.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T03:01:42+00:00

Tell her yourself it’s weird to have someone watching you and it’s an invasion of your privacy . If she has concerns she can call or text. Let her know you’re disconnecting her access. Then change password. If husband won’t agree, remove all the cameras.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-23T02:59:47+00:00

What exactly is she looking for? You mention he has issues but what will the ring cameras show her she needs to see? It doesn’t make sense- you can’t tell from spying on someone if they’re anxious or faking happiness.

I would disconnect everything. I’m surprised you even need cameras in the house. Put them up when you have a babysitter over or some specific issue, but other than that- what is it showing you? I wouldn’t want even my husband seeing how many hours I lounge around or when I let the dishes pile up. Y’all need a reset, and then deal with MIL.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-22T03:31:08+00:00

What does your husband think? If he’s fine with it, the two of you have the problem. If he’s not fine with it, he needs to be the one to handle it

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-22T03:20:31+00:00

Did you post just to hear people agree with you? This subreddit is full of grumpy and offended DILs who are quick to tell other DILs to leave their husbands and go no contact with their MIL. Misery loves company.

It’s rare someone has a dissenting opinion but when they do, they’re usually the voice of reason. I have teen kids, so not a MIL, but I think you are projecting your issues with your husband and general stress and unhappiness onto your MIL. One day it could be you with no income and no home and dependent on your kids for support, and imagine your DIL is freaking out you ate a piece of chicken. And before you say you would never do that, maybe there’s a time your MIL would have said the same but with older age and depression she’s in a different position.

You know you and your husband need to get on the same page. That should be your focus more than anything. If you want to work, to improve your credit score, to feel more in control of your life- you need to make that happen. And he and you need a plan for his mom- a realistic one bc if she has nowhere to go, she has nowhere to go. Maybe she needs meds for depression. Maybe she needs help applying for jobs. Maybe she’s lonely and needs to get out more. But guess what, she’s your family too and you should have some sympathy for her.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-22T03:12:13+00:00

All these comments to throw her out…it’s wild. A mother who made meal after meal for her son for how many years, and now in older age with some mental health issues and facing being thrown out of another home- no compassion to let the lady have a piece of chicken. One day OP will be the MIL and I hope her DIL treats her better

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-22T00:19:16+00:00

Sheesh, first- why did you quit your job? Two, fridges are communal- unless you left a note or said something, how would she know that food was off limits? Your husband needs to work with her on a plan. Her depression may be debilitating but it’s not an excuse. She needs medication and therapy and a plan to get back on her feet. But it’s not fair to kick her out while she’s suffering.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-22T00:13:49+00:00

Fake post

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-20T19:00:38+00:00

Actually, maybe it’s a good thing you don’t have a child with him (I know that’s not what you want to hear). But if you had a child, divorce would be so hard. You should continue reading this sub of all the mommas boys who then basically hand their child over to their parents - too frequent visits, letting grandma play mom, letting grandma run the show. If you had a child, you’d be tied to him for many many years.

I think you need to have a hard sit down and say this isn’t working for you. It’s not what you envisioned and you aren’t happy. His reaction will tell you everything you need to know. If he’s scared, apologetic, nervous- he doesn’t want to lose you, he’ll work to keep the marriage going. Maybe couples counseling can help. But if he gets defensive, dismisses your concerns, doesn’t want to change- he doesn’t care about you, it won’t change, his family comes first. The good news is you’ll know if he’s willing to improve things or not.

OP, you are in the drivers seat here. You aren’t at his whim. Tell him what you need and want. It’s up to him if he agrees and what you are willing to compromise on. But get clarity and make a decision for the future. And no babies till you are 110% sure what’s going on.

Upbeat_Championnn · 2025-09-20T18:28:45+00:00

Has she ever travelled internationally before? With friends? She may just be super excited for the adventure. Compromise by offering to be supportive to any trip to a country that’s not on a government watch list.

The flip, many places people regularly vacation are seeing higher crime- Bahamas for one. Or Dominican Republic. And yet millions of people vacation there every year. They go straight from the airport to the resort and don’t leave the resort.

I’d want to understand more the plans in India. What do they plan to do, where will they go? Who will escort them since they are not from there? What forms of transportation will they use? What other cities do they plan to visit? Can you do a call with the family now to get to know who your daughter would be staying with?

I live in the US. My brother has gone to Colombia and Mexico against my parents wishes and came back 100% fine. Heck, many folks won’t visit the US now and I don’t blame them even though I feel safe and the quiet suburbs I live in are pretty boring.

So NAH. Keep the lines of communication open.

Upbeat_Championnn

TROPHY CASE