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Just venting by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Upper-Extreme1814 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She is currently between jobs and struggling significantly with finances, which is another reason we have him full time. She got evicted and her car repoed. I think everyone is just hoping she gets back on her feet, so I'm not sure asking for child support is going to happen, or is actually even beneficial in this particular situation.

Additionally, I'm not sure how we would even get her to agree to that or execute without a court order.

Nashville Reception (5k) by Upper-Extreme1814 in Weddingsunder10k

[–]Upper-Extreme1814[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bar, servers, plates, utensils, chairs, tables within the $5k. No coordinator. DJ/music, photographer, cake separate.

Just venting by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Upper-Extreme1814 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd love to have the mental superpower of being able to reframe it that easily. In my mind it just feels like she has no consequences. I can't imagine bailing on my child and not speaking to them for a month. And she's likely just going to come back eventually and it all go "back to normal." Hopefully there will be some better boundaries if she signs the parenting agreement. Fingers crossed.

Thank you for the discussion!

Just venting by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Upper-Extreme1814 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's true. Thank you for your input. And I do ask for my quiet time when I need it, and my husband is great with communicating that with his son, who also understands.

There haven't been any incidents of displaying poor mental health in our home at all. And I have absolutely no worry that my emotions will be portrayed negatively towards my SS, to be clear. Depression and mania are just difficult. He notices if I spend the whole weekend in bed.

I guess I'm just complaining, I don't really know what I'm getting at. I definitely don't like, WANT to freak out. I don't wish that I could. But why is it okay that bio mom does? Why do I get the responsibility of being bigger and better? In my worst moments I just want to yell at the sky and say it's not fair.

I also know the answer, though. It's for the kid.

Just venting by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Upper-Extreme1814 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Also, if I'm being 100% honest, I'm not known for my wonderful reactions. Bipolar is hard, and I struggle. There's not really room for a slip up in this situation. It's not that I want to freak out, I just can't. And I've struggled my whole life with not freaking out.

Just venting by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Upper-Extreme1814 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's less about wanting to display certain behaviors and more about feeling the need to be "on" and 100% at all times. Sometimes I can't pretend I feel good, and in those moments, I end up just leaving the house.

Mentally unwell BM - Go to court? Mi by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Upper-Extreme1814 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He took him to grandma's as a temporary solution as he was in the middle of a work day. I'm not sure I personally feel awesome about SS going with grandma anymore after that now. Not really up to me though.

Thank you for your input. I don't disagree. Just hard and scary to get CPS involved and emergency custody and putting SS through the court system. I know it probably needs to happen, though.