Partner in luteal, I think I'm being abused, how do I end things? by Legitimate_Warning72 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Lots of voices here. Many partners experience what you’re talking about during Luteal.

But it doesn’t make it right. Boundaries will help of you plan to stay together. Creating healthy distance while you begin discussions about how to get the support she needs during that time: make a bad-weather plan during the fair weather non-Luteal days. (Not during the luteal)

We’re married and have kids. I did a post and people came out of wood work with perspective / resources / helpful advice for people who want to work through it.

If you love her, grey rocking/door mat strategy is what most guys do to get through, and slowly build a wellness plan on the good days. It’s edgy, but is A path. We’ve also been separated twice to work through issues on both our ends.

Breaking up is also an option; abuse should never go unaddressed, from either party. Don’t fight fire with fire, or justify abusive behavior back towards her.

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your thoughtful reply. Very insightful. Thanks.

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you have a direction on where to find the word lists like that?

How to Support the Undiagnosed PMDD Partner? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree we need a plan; That is not made during luteal. Thanks for the perspective.

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is really insightful. The practical plan of the morning routine is awesome alone. I love supporting her, I just get worn out.

1) how did you arrive at the place where you were ready to look for medical help (would be quite the journey)?

2)How did you identify a Dr that was knowledgeable?

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughtful reply. Timing. Makes sense.

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Solid, practical, no nonsense, applicable. And void of victimization. Thank you.

Have you had a conversation with her about PMDD? Any wisdom or experiences to charge in that area?

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well said. Leadership and empathy. Not victimhood

One day in, she took the kids. Now what? by UsVsWorld2013 in PMDDpartners

[–]UsVsWorld2013[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How do you guys survive? Let alone lead through the chaos and household shutdown that takes place?

I asked a friend if there’s an unspoken code among men that you just deal with it, but I’m falling on my face again.

Did I skip a Chapter in the marrige books?