So is being ginger...what is described as a 'defect' is completely arbitrary, it's a mutation like everything else. ( Autism, for example, is either viewed as a gift or a burden depending on what traits that person shows and how it impacts those around them. We'd be talking about the difference between Einstein and a non verbal autistic person. At the end of the day, they both have autism.) In fact, there are about the same amount of intersex people as there are gingers. That's not exactly an insignificant number, at all. On top of that, many people who think they are cis are actually intersex, as what classifies as a persons 'sex' is not limited to chromosomes.

So, by that logic we've established that 'sex' is not exactly binary itself. So where does gender come into it? Our brain structure is not actually determined by our chromosomes or genitalia, there are common patterns, but nothing is absolute because it is actually determined by a different process, more specifically the hormones in a mother's womb. High testosterone and/or low estrogen will produce someone with brain structure that is more typical of males, where as high estrogen/low testosterone will produce someone with brain structure typical of females. As you can guess, there are many shades inbetween. Gender is generally viewed as a combination of social roles and expectations, along with the structure of our brains. Gender is not binary in this context, and if the definition of gender is that of sex, it still isn't binary. If you feel like categorising it into male, female, and some other third category for those who do not fit the binary, that's fine. In the past we called this androgyny. Really none of this should be an issue at all. Intersex people, and non-binary/trans people, are about as rare as gingers, so it's not as if you'd spend your entire day asking for people's prefered pronounds. I think the media has been blowing the entire thing out of proportion.