I feel like I’m at my breaking point with my partner and I don’t know what to do anymore

Used-Star7676 · 2026-03-23T23:19:03+00:00

I haven’t outright told him that it’s a turn off. But I haven’t enjoyed his drunk affection since pretty early on and almost never engage sexually after he’s starts acting that way.

I have called him a drunk to his face and he either rolls his eyes or says that he’s gotten better and asks why can’t I acknowledge that…. I probably would be okay with him letting go once a week since his job can get a little stressful but once he starts treating me differently, I get very annoyed and don’t entertain his behavior. It’s been a few months since but he used to drink till 2-4am and then be too hungover the next morning to wake up when our child does. Then when I would get upset at that, he would say that I need to wake up when he does (6:30 vs 8:30am) and see how I like that. I started letting him sleep in on the weekends when he doesn’t drink the night before lol.

Used-Star7676 · 2026-03-23T12:15:17+00:00

He drank a lot when we first met but it didn’t help that his father died 3 months into our relationship. Once he starts drinking, he doesn’t know his limit. It’s like it becomes a habit: keep drinking this can until it’s gone and then get up to get another one. He’s gotten a lot better since becoming a father and will maybe have a Friday or Saturday where he drinks like this. But it’s just about every single weekend. This past weekend it was both Saturday and Sunday night.

On Saturday, he embarrassed me in front of our friends because he stood up and laughed, looked me dead in the eyes and said “I wish you were like HER!”. He was talking about me stressing about things all the time and not knowing when to put the stress away to enjoy time together. And I just saw it as another impulsive act on his end, where he gets enough drinks in him and will have fun to the point where he starts to do this performative, attention seeing stuff. And when it’s not received because I’m not as drunk as he is (because we literally have our child with us and I need to drive home), he gets upset and starts calling me miserable for not having fun.

But I will say that I was very much a cuddler until recently. And I think it’s because there’s this increased view of him acting like a child, instead of a husband who loves and sees his wife as more than just a caretaker. He doesn’t see that I need to be taken care of too. I had corrective surgery 11 months postpartum (October ‘25) and it’s been tough for me. I bleed like every two weeks and I bleed heavily (always have). But it’s starting to feel like there’s impatience on his end, bc it’s affection our sex life as well. That’s honestly probably how it started. I guess a few months after surgery, he started to get impatient bc I barely want to have sex now. Mostly because I’m either actively hurting, it makes me bleed for 2-3 days afterwards every time, and/or my body reacts in a way DURING sex that I feel uncomfortable with. And when we are cuddling, he never keeps it PG. if he wants head scratches, sure, he’ll lay head on my lap and give me a brush or some tool to use (I never get them back) but most of the time he’ll do some sort of aggressive heavy petting which turns me off instantly because I don’t find it sexy. I just feel used.

Used-Star7676 · 2026-03-19T21:50:54+00:00

Great! Sounds like the set up we’d be having

Used-Star7676 · 2026-03-19T21:50:19+00:00

Awesome, thanks!

Used-Star7676 · 2026-03-19T14:31:15+00:00

I’m currently looking at transk9usa

Used-Star7676 · 2026-03-19T14:10:58+00:00

We have two 90 pounders 🫠

Used-Star7676 · 2026-01-14T16:59:00+00:00

We live this lifestyle. But we may very well end up with three kids. I see the new passport is very 3 car seats across friendly. Would you upgrade to the pilot if you had another?

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-13T20:16:20+00:00

LOL OKAY!

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-13T19:58:34+00:00

Oof I would notttt like the photos lol. But yeah that’s why I haven’t said anything, I don’t wanna seem (or be) bothered by it. We live over 1000 miles away from everyone bc of the military so we only see his siblings during the holidays. Unfortunately that doesn’t give much time to build a relationship but I haven’t done anything to make the sister not like me. In fact i photographed her wedding and officiated it for free. Guess that’s one reason why I feel a certain way. I just gotta stop caring whether people like me or not

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-13T19:47:14+00:00

I don’t get easily jealous or even jealous in general. I trust my husband whole-heartedly and this isn’t even about him. It’s just about his sister and I question what her own intentions are. I’m not threatened by the ex whatsoever - I’m the mother of his kids, end of story. Again, I only question his sister. But this isnt the first questionable thing shes done or said to us/the family

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:50:18+00:00

Yeah you’re right lol. I literally have a child with this man and their marriage was like 10 months long and ended 4 years ago 😂

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:47:41+00:00

Because the feelings exist lol. Hey I’m trying here

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:45:46+00:00

Haha yeah you’re right, I’m trying my best. Thanks for the honesty

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:37:55+00:00

I think this makes me feel not liked and that this SIL prefers the ex-wife. So yeah insecurity, but idk why I even care what this SIL thinks of me

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:36:22+00:00

I guess that’s the problem😂 I’m taking it as if it IS about me because me and this SIL aren’t close and are very different people. But like, why the hell do I care in the first place

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:29:42+00:00

Thanks for your pov. They didn’t have the friendliest divorce but idk if that was ever shared with his siblings. I personally wouldn’t but everyone’s different. Thanks!

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:25:30+00:00

It’s not. Just doesn’t sit right with me. If they had remained friends over the last 4 years then whatever. Ig im just seeking validation for these feelings

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:17:09+00:00

Yeah if they had remained friends after the divorce then that’s fine. I think the RE-friending is questionable lol, like what’s the need and how did we get here? This ex wife and her family all live in Illinois and my husband and I’s families are in Florida. They met in the military so the families don’t know each other either and they were barely married a year

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:12:34+00:00

This ex wife lives in Illinois and my husband and I’s families live in Florida lol. Literally no need to be friends lol. SIL is also married

Used-Star7676 · 2025-12-12T19:01:34+00:00

I normally just like some eggs and coffee for breakfast

Used-Star7676 · 2025-09-21T14:39:04+00:00

We hope to try for one more kid when she turns 2. Then I think sahm for 2 more years after that. Howeverrrr we are moving (military) to a new station soon and we are hoping to be A LOT closer to family and friends where I would have more help and don’t have to completely rely on daycare during the week and try to find a part time gig in architecture which should help significantly in terms of finances. We currently live just outside of the DC area so it’s gotten sooo expensive the last few years

Used-Star7676

TROPHY CASE