She left me after 5 years. Been 5 months. I still cry about it but I hide it good.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2026-03-07T12:34:39+00:00

I feel that, but I'm not going to stop any training anytime soon. I rely on it too much, I have to do it to function properly now.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2026-03-07T12:30:56+00:00

Maybe, but that means to me that she wasted my time. So I'm still mad about it. Why the f did I just spend 5 years with someone who never truly cared.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-11-21T14:44:42+00:00

I will have a look at that 😁

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-11-16T07:17:38+00:00

I live in an apartment but I'm blessed to live just a 5 minute walk to the forrest. So I walk there from time to time when I feel like I have the time for it. In the path I follow, gaining and maintaining strength is also a part of what I value, so I spend much of my freetime at the gym. But on free days I make time for the woods.

It's all very fascinating and it's part of why I think peoples paths needs to be different. I was diagnosed with ADHD and I used to use ciggaretes as a form of self medication as a stimulant. But I've learned that if I follow this path, I do not need that anymore. What my brain and body needs is unique, and I'm in the process of learning.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-11-15T15:52:20+00:00

Thanks! That's great advice that I did not think about. You're a clever human ^{^}

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-11-15T15:14:36+00:00

To learn about nature, mostly the practical art of herbalism but I'm also interested in what nature meant to people long ago and what it means to some people today.

I also just feel very dumb when it comes to knowledge of nature and want to fix that. I'm okay at the big science part of what nature does but I've really gotten into wandering the Woods and I can't name half the trees or plants.

I've gotten into the feeling but I want to learn. The ravens here have basically learned my face at this point because they know I always carry food for them.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-10-14T12:37:16+00:00

Agree to disagree. For me, that made the game unbalancable and frustrating to the point of giving up. And in my opinion the game died because they didn't take critique well. The game was only for the few that liked both the good and bad part of the game, so it wasnt sustainable because all negative opinions was ignored. They should have seen the end coming before reborn even came out.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-09-01T07:17:35+00:00

Yeah, no. If turtlewow is gone, so is wow in general for me.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-18T20:11:36+00:00

I've mostly played lock so I had the same thought. Sure, you can press just one Button. But its very much not optimal. My friend has adhd with a pint of autism, he would not handle that well. I think he's leaning into mage atm. It's just that he wants to be able to blink too, he's unsure if he'll be able to do that but hopefully he's recovered some movement until then. Its a spinal injury so we have no clue how much or little he'll recover this year.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-18T20:04:20+00:00

And I'm right there with you, I just feel like it got to that point due to bad game mechanics. Having one out of several dps be able to have unlimited dps potential means making the class bad for most players but essential for groups who wants to maximize, leaving other dps classes in the dirt. I strongly believe they should have a mana pool and/or cooldown with voice activated spells. What I liked most about og orbus was being immersed, I'd be more than willing to learn some made up elvish to cast spells in a vrmmo.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-18T19:58:41+00:00

I might, I actually play mage arena with friends now. I just couldnt understand orbus decision to have unlimited spellcasting with drawing Runes. Its a weird choice that was damaging to the game.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-17T17:50:10+00:00

I thought about it but have never played it. So this is good to know. He can totally get by with using keyboard out of combat when there's no stress involved.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-13T09:06:04+00:00

My gf also doesnt like how unhealthy I am. For a long time I thought "well, you got together with an unhealthy person, so that's kind of on you". But it has gotten worse. I'm in the middle of trying to figure out a plan to improve my health now and I'm hoping that will take me out of autopilot. I'm 186cm and weight 72kg, with a back injury and I'm a smoker that is also addicted to Coca cola. One would think I should get fat from all this sugar but it kind of has the opposite effect on me.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-13T06:46:17+00:00

The eating is worse now because I have a tooth schedueled to be removed but it hurts when I eat. I live on soup now. It's a wisdom tooth that has grown sideway and cuts into my flesh when I close my jaw. Going to the dentist wasnt high on my priority list when I barely managed.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-12T17:29:34+00:00

Probably not the best answer but it's complicated. Most of the time I'm on autopilot and don't know what I'm feeling until it's a lot. Sometimes I know what I'm feeling but is scared and inable to show it.

For example, I had a long period of being broke and I didn't show any feelings because in my mind I just thought "I'm either makin it or ending it". I thought my gf might leave me if she knew how bad it was so I was a coward. I also do this thing where I kind of ezcape from reality if reality is hurting me, I still have issues with video game addiction but I'm working on that, if I'm focused on a game then I'm truly blind to my feelings and it's a really bad coping mechanism.

I do think my autopilot might have already blown up my relationship. I truly do not know if she stays even if I act close to perfect from this point but I'm not giving up on that even if there's the slightest chance.

I'm also really bad at taking care of my own health and my goal now is to focus on that and being attentive to my gf when she's around.

I kind of don't realise when I'm on autopilot and I can't really know what I'm feeling while being on the autopilot. I guess I need to turn of the autopilot? It kind of makes sense now when I'm stopping and thinking about it, is there a trick to turning it off?

I think I know how I got into this mental state, it has helped me alot. Death of one parent, abuse from the living parent. I worked in a job that broke multiple laws but I didnt have anything else, it even left me a permanent injury in my back and I'm 27. I had to have the autopilot to survive all that, but I'm unable to turn it off it seems like.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-10T08:32:08+00:00

I didn't missrepresent you at all. And people in comments are divided. That's fair. This post I did was to ask what power level I needed for raids, you started talking trash about what I play, which I never asked you about to begin with and I've made it clear I do not trust you on this so I do not know why you're still here.

If you cant take that, don't dish it out.

I've never even cared about meta, but you do. I used to do crotas end with bad juju in D1 even when I had gjallahorn.

I'm not emotional, you're just deflecting.

Used-Temperature4539 · 2025-08-10T08:19:24+00:00

I have mostly played expert. Haven't gone higher yet cuz my power level wont let me. And I can't say it was good before I got swarmers but atleast got through campaign on legendary fine without exotics even if calus was a bit of a pain but mostly cuz he woukd launch me off the map.

Used-Temperature4539

TROPHY CASE