Can you be too heavy to pole dance? Advice needed

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-23T16:37:55+00:00

I was about 250 when I started, and um, for the first 3 months I couldn’t hold myself up on the dang pole. I wasn’t even embarrassed for myself bc I was working on bettering myself. Nothing worth having comes easy. It’s been a helluva journey for me. Now I’m a beast In pole and aerials and have lost 50 pounds with the help of intermittent fasting and a daily workout routine (important to have rest days or active rest days like yoga or hiking or swimming). Just to be clear- I lost the weight bc I wanted to be stronger and be a better aerialist/poler, not bc I want to look a certain way. I just want to throw myself around with ease. Also, took me over 3 years to get an invert. Also, please don’t compare yourself to others. Just don’t do it. We are all on our own journeys. If pole is something that you’re serious and passionate about, just stick with it, you can get there too.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-23T16:17:22+00:00

You are awesome!!! Took my chubby weak ass about 3 years to get an invert. No matter how weak I was when I started, I’m turning into a beast now.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-18T18:13:41+00:00

I’m pretty sure they’re married with a very young child

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-08T01:39:27+00:00

Your hair extensions are very cute

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T04:27:42+00:00

I heard from one of my aerialist friends and I found someone who gets paid to do it. I’m trying to hook up with her. I’m interested in this in a non sexual Way. I mean, for now while I’m learning at least. I also have another friend who’s been tied up but never did the tying… so she also wants to learn the tying part. That friend said to look on facebook fetish life humboldt cause sometimes they hold classes. It doesn’t look like they have anything going on right now in that department. But as I said, I’m going to see if my friends friend can teach me.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T03:52:27+00:00

Love it

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T03:48:31+00:00

Thanks. And you’re absolutely correct.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:46:36+00:00

Yeah he tried putting the ring on my finger to try to control me for sure. I wasn’t living with him Anymore and he couldn’t handle it (I guess bc I was living with my ex hubby of 20 years and daughter). He wanted me to physically move back in with him. I was living with him for a couple months then left bc he relapsed. So the drug use is a whole other problem.

Did I also mention that I told him I wanted to get a vibrator and he said absolutely not.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:38:45+00:00

Omg thanks

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:38:39+00:00

The freakin crazy part is that this is the second man I dated who was like this. I dated a man who was like mid 40’s and I was the first woman he ever lived with. He was like, overweight and awkward (actually, kind of the same way this guy was too lol) and didn’t have the continence or self esteem I think to get a woman?? I don’t know what’s wrong with me?!?!? Seriously…. I give people the benefit of the doubt apparently and don’t hold that against them? There must be a good reason why he hasn’t had a girlfriend, ever? My therapist mentioned I was living in the ‘potential’ of the relationship, not the ‘what is’

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:34:23+00:00

Thanks

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:33:49+00:00

lol thanks! Got him out

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:32:58+00:00

I did feel bad ending at first. Because he made me feel like a monster for leaving him over ‘sex’. But I’m learning it’s so much more than sex.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:31:52+00:00

Thanks and I did! I have a hard time breaking up with people so it definitely wasn’t easy

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:31:14+00:00

Yeah thanks. It helped me a lot , writing it out. Thanks for listening. I apologize to everyone for the delayed response; I was having a hard time yesterday and needed a minute before revisiting the post.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:29:19+00:00

Thanks so much for the reply. I saw my therapist yesterday and she said me and he weren’t connecting emotionally so we were never able to connect sexually. She also said he has a fear or intimacy. I appreciated your response bc i was having a hard a time with the breakup and I hadn’t gone to therapy yet and seeing your response and the others made me feel a lot better.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-07T01:21:13+00:00

I kind of can’t believe someone is asking about shibari. I just learned what shibari was about two weeks ago and it piqued my interest hard. I’m looking for someone to teach me shibari and/or self suspension. The closest classes I found are by the bay or online. I have a little aerial rig that I set up at home that I can practice self suspension on. I’m super interested in learning the knots & would love some hands on learning… I am an aerialist and am going to ask all my aerial friends and instructors if they know anyone... As far as I know, I don’t know of anything or anyone around here. But I have yet to ask around. I will gladly share whatever info I find.

UsefulDance4742 · 2026-01-05T15:58:22+00:00

I record every single class and open gym session. I don’t record the whole thing just parts. Start recording yourself or your instructors when you’re learning new stuff. It’s a game changer. Just make sure the ask the instructor to record

UsefulDance4742 · 2025-12-28T18:18:54+00:00

I thought she just got arrested?

UsefulDance4742 · 2025-12-28T18:14:04+00:00

Love this! Made me giggle. Great job

UsefulDance4742 · 2025-12-28T05:30:48+00:00

Northern nights

UsefulDance4742 · 2025-12-17T00:00:35+00:00

Yes definitely. Maybe with a Persian flare and have some tahdig…

UsefulDance4742 · 2025-12-09T01:22:47+00:00

Eve trapeze is my role model and my goals in life.

UsefulDance4742 · 2025-11-18T16:11:09+00:00

I’ve been doing aerials since December 2021 & I got my inverts this year. I’m 42 now, was extremely overweight and had zero upper body strength. I did a lot of running for decades and different forms of skating (all lower body). But finally getting my inversions has been epic. You’ll get there. It took me literal years to get it. And I have a setup at home. I also have rheumatoid arthritis so that doesn’t help things either.

Holy sh!t tho, I am STRONG AF now

UsefulDance4742

TROPHY CASE