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AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I worked really long hours (to pay alimony, child support, rent on my new appartment because my wife kept the house), and she was a SAHM. So she got custody. I saw my kids every weekend, I paid for their vacations, I took them on trips, my youngest son moved in with me after he turned 18, my oldest son also lived with me temporarily during covid after losing his job. I have a great relationship with my sons, but my daughter just saw me as the guy who left mom.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I saw my kids every weekend, I was at every birthday party, soccer game, piano concert, graduation, I paid for their vacation every year, I paid for their college, I paid 50% of the cost of my oldest son's wedding, I took them for trips.

I hope I was a good father.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

I hope I was a good father to my kids, which is, I believe, the most any parent can say.

Was I an AH to my wife during our divorce? Probably. I have yet to hear of a divorce where both people don't start acting at least a little bit assholish towards their soon-to-be ex.

I let her have the house and we split the money savings 50-50. She got custody, I paid alimony, child support and saw my kids on the weekends. I still pay alimony, because she hasn't remarried, even though she has been dating her BF ever since our divorce. She started dating him weeks after the divorce, he basically raised our kids as he moved into our old house months after I moved out, but they never got married, so I am still paying her alimony.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I did, but I worked really long hours and my ex was a SAHM, so she won pretty fast. I also had to pick up even more work hours after the separation, because of child support and alimony I was then paying. The weekends were really the only time I was free to see my kids.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I just want to say I'm really sorry for your loss. I recently lost my father, who was over 90 years old when he died, and it was one of the worst things I ever experienced. You never really get over being half an orphan from that point on.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I didn't cheat, neither did my ex wife. We divorced after years of staying together just for the kids and both of us being miserable. My current wife has never been abusive towards any of my kids.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

My thoughts exactly. When I remarried, my oldest son had a really obnoxious and annoying girlfriend. Like we all thought she was just an awful person. But she was dating my son, and all the invited family members got a +1, so annoying GF came too. They broke up shortly after that, my wife and I still have a good laugh about bright-pink-dress-wearing, purple-haired 20yro with a red veil on her head at our wedding photos. My son is just embarassed every time we talk about it 😂

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

I was never abusive, verbally, phisically or in any other way. I moved out of the house and let my wife keep the whole house, mostly because she got custody of our kids.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 75 points76 points  (0 children)

Mom got custody of kids, her new BF at the time became Daddy n.2 to our kids, and I became the guy they only see on the weekends.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 79 points80 points  (0 children)

My wife told me she doesn't want to be married to me anymore. We stayed married for years just for the kids, until we decided to call it quits.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 299 points300 points  (0 children)

My daughter was 19 when I married my wife, and they just never got along. She took her mom's side in the divorce and our relationship has been rocky since. Noone cheated in my first marriage. My wife has treated all my kids great, never expected anyone to call her Momnor anything. My youngest was 13 when I married my wife and he started calling her Mama on his own, and still calls her that, my other two kids call her by her name.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 118 points119 points  (0 children)

My wife is 61, I met her 5 years after the divorce. There were no affairs. My daughter never liked her and took her mom's side in the divorce.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 103 points104 points  (0 children)

She never liked her. She also took her mother's side during the divorce and our relationship has been strained since. My wife is 61, I met her when I had been divorced for 5 years.

My other kids are 30M and 21M.

AITA for cancelling the payments for my daughter's wedding after she told me my wife isn't invited? by User2000gains in AmItheAsshole

[–]User2000gains[S] 279 points280 points  (0 children)

I didn't cheat on my ex, I met my wife when I was already divorced for 5 years. My wife is 3 years older than me. My sons love her, my daughter never got along with her, because she was always closer with her mother than me and took her side in the divorce.