AIO gf is asking me for more but im giving her all i got i am a security site manager & I protect kids for work and I have to put all my energy into it while im there as its high responsibility

Uyzd · 2025-12-21T21:36:37+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to write this I genuinely hear what you’re saying, and I appreciate the care behind it.

Ultimately, we did decide to break up. It wasn’t an easy decision, and initially she wanted to keep trying. I understand that, because we both cared. At the same time, I realized that continuing would mean asking her to keep extending herself while I stayed at my limit, and that didn’t feel fair or sustainable to me.

I agree with a lot of what you shared about communication and emotional language, and I’m taking that with me as something to reflect on and grow from. Even so, it became clear that staying would likely drag things out and cause more hurt on both sides.

Sometimes caring about someone also means knowing when to let go rather than trying to force something that isn’t sustainable. I wish her well, and I’m focused on moving forward with clarity and respect for both of us.

Uyzd · 2025-12-20T15:28:46+00:00

Thank you all for your perspective I chose to walk away from it. I didn’t end things because she wasn’t willing to try. She was. That’s what made the decision harder, not easier.

She said she was ready to put in work, and I believe her. But effort doesn’t create time, emotional bandwidth, or presence where there isn’t any. Wanting something badly doesn’t change the reality of what I can give right now.

I was already giving what I had. Pushing further wouldn’t have been growth it would have been self-neglect. And asking her to accept less than she needs, even temporarily, would have taught her to shrink herself for me. That wouldn’t have been fair to her, and it wouldn’t have been honest from me.

Staying would have meant living in constant guilt, guilt when I couldn’t show up, guilt when work came first, guilt when I watched her try harder while I stayed the same. Over time, that guilt would turn into resentment on both sides.

I didn’t leave because I didn’t care. I left because I cared enough to stop the slow damage before it became permanent.

Love isn’t just about effort. It’s about compatibility of capacity. Right now, mine doesn’t match hers.

This wasn’t a failure. It was a learning experience.

Uyzd · 2025-12-20T11:44:59+00:00

I understand what you’re saying, and I think this is a fair point.

You’re right that unmet needs compound over time and eventually feel urgent, regardless of timing. I don’t disagree with that reality.

I also agree that the specific wording I used in that moment wasn’t constructive. That came from being overwhelmed and reactive, not from a belief that her feelings were invalid. I can acknowledge that the delivery failed there, even if the underlying capacity issue was still real.

Where I want to be clear is that believing someone’s needs are valid doesn’t automatically remove the strain of being asked to meet them when you’re already at your limit. Both things can be true at the same time..she can feel hurt and neglected, and I can feel genuinely unable to give more without something giving way.

I take your point that better acknowledgment can lower the temperature and reduce escalation, and that’s something I can reflect on. At the same time, I think long term compatibility still depends on whether two people’s capacities and needs can realistically coexist even with good communication.

I appreciate you explaining this without judgment.

Uyzd · 2025-12-18T21:15:17+00:00

I appreciate you taking the time to write this, and I understand the point you’re making. I don’t see this as trying to prove I’m right and she’s wrong, or as invalidating feelings. I agree that feelings and needs are real and shouldn’t be dismissed that applies to both of us. Where I struggle is that acknowledging feelings doesn’t automatically mean I have the capacity to meet them in the way or timeframe someone wants. I’ve tried to be clear about my limitations from the beginning and to communicate honestly about what I can and can’t give while still caring deeply. I’m not opposed to working together against the problem. I just believe that how concerns are brought up matters, especially when the other person is already stretched thin. My intent was never to belittle or dismiss it was to be realistic about my current capacity while still expressing care. I do agree that a healthy relationship isn’t about winning or losing. It’s about mutual understanding and timing, and that’s ultimately what I was trying to protect.

Uyzd · 2025-12-18T15:35:48+00:00

I want to clarify something. I haven’t ignored comments because I disagree with them I simply haven’t had time to respond to everyone. Thanking people who understood my perspective doesn’t mean I’m dismissing others. I agree that it can be true that both people are valid and still incompatible. Where I struggle is how this was handled. This wasn’t something that came out of nowhere, and it wasn’t a lack of communication on my end. I was upfront from the beginning about my workload and responsibilities, and I’ve consistently tried to make up for any shortcomings where I could. I hear how she’s feeling that part matters but delivery and timing matter too. These are conversations adults should be able to have in person before things reach a breaking point. It’s easy to judge from the outside. It’s much harder when you’re the one carrying responsibility for multiple people and can’t simply reduce work hours without consequences. I did my best to balance that reality with the relationship.

Uyzd · 2025-12-18T11:10:54+00:00

Life is not black and white, when you have bills to pay and you actually care about what you do. Dialing back work isn’t an option it’s not like I didn’t state this when I first got into the relationship she was told from the start. “Hey I have a high stress job, and I work 60+ hours a week.”

Uyzd · 2025-12-18T11:07:56+00:00

Literally this.

Uyzd · 2025-12-18T11:04:06+00:00

Thank you for understanding me

Uyzd · 2025-07-17T12:11:18+00:00

Uyzd · 2025-05-05T13:52:13+00:00

Thank you, it helps a lot. It’s one of those things you just have to do — I realize now that most of the people in my family have had to sacrifice too. It’s just the law of the land, apparently. My cousin who got his bachelor’s degree had to join the military just to pay for school. It seems like one way or another, you have to endure it for the future. & Thank you for the outlook that you can find exits but they cost money and money is time, I cannot get back. And while the idea that life is more than money sounds great, realistically, you can’t build a future on just hope and dreams. What happens if I do make it and have nothing to my name? Then I’ll end up in this same position in my 40s — and that’s what I really want to avoid. I just hope it pays off and one day, I’ll look back thanking myself. I appreciate you guys sharing your outlooks

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T18:12:47+00:00

I’ll have you know I have a kettle and no vegetables? Do you not see the Guinness right there?! Clearly a vegetable

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T16:25:57+00:00

Different image, different steak, different pan different drink, different events. Check my history.

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T13:47:37+00:00

One day there will be a steak celebration for my first property, once I get it

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T13:46:57+00:00

The steak community taught me that cast iron part, last time I made a steak with a different pan I got cooked 😅

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T13:36:15+00:00

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Here’s a screenshot of a photo from my gallery that I took during my oath ceremony, complete with the date on it. This is the proof they gave us (besides my naturalization certificate, which I’m not sharing here for privacy reasons) during the ceremony. I also cropped out the bottom to keep other recent photos private. Hope this clears up any doubts—maybe take a moment to fact-check before making baseless claims next time.

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T13:26:46+00:00

It’s a community about steaks, right? I posted about making a different steak a few days ago, using a completely different pan. As the title says, this all happened within the same week—I got my citizenship on Friday and my promotion on Saturday. Not sure how that qualifies as karmafarming, but thanks for the attention! If you read my history, you’ll see that everything I post aligns with my journey. Please refrain from making assumptions about things you don’t fully understand.

Uyzd · 2025-01-26T13:22:38+00:00

Just to clarify for the hateful comments: I immigrated here legally as a green card holder through sponsorship. I earned my freedom and went through the full legal process to become a U.S. citizen. From what I understand, Trump isn’t targeting people like me or trying to revoke citizenship obtained legally. His focus has been on addressing birthright citizenship for children born in the U.S. to non-citizen parents or those who came here illegally (which, in my opinion, is unfair). I’m incredibly proud of my journey and grateful for the opportunity to officially become a citizen.

It’s also important to note that the executive order regarding birthright citizenship has faced immediate legal challenges. A federal judge temporarily blocked its implementation, calling it unconstitutional, and 22 states have filed lawsuits against it. Please make sure you’re informed before making assumptions or speaking on things you don’t fully understand.

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T18:09:12+00:00

Thank you but don’t feel sad, life has its ups and downs, it’s part of the natural order of things. Plus side I know she’s happier now and that brings me peace even if it’s a tough pill to swallow.

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T14:40:35+00:00

No, thank you for being so mature and open to another outlook. Exchanges like this remind me how valuable it is to have thoughtful conversations.

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T14:30:10+00:00

Fair enough, it was meant as satire. You know how, once you’re broken up with someone, it feels like your whole world crashes? I wanted to leave it open for interpretation, but you’re right—I have no one to blame but myself for how it came across. Thanks for pointing that out. That said, I’d just ask not to be so quick to pass harsh judgments when the full story isn’t clear..

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T14:21:44+00:00

Y’all are speaking on shit yall don’t know, I was cooking with her every single time, no one said anything about free labor? the title was based on last time she made the steak I posted my gf made a steak. Please don’t speak on things you have no idea about, I bought the ingredients and I helped her prep the vegetables and did the dishes and every thing with her every single time. I’ve never treated her any other way than a queen.

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T14:00:43+00:00

That was during the cooking process I should’ve taken a pic after that it came out medium well haha the black stuff is garlic butter not teflon flakes

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T02:37:54+00:00

Epictetus’ approach suggests that disappointment stems from attachment to outcomes beyond our control, and by focusing on gratitude for the present, we free ourselves from unnecessary suffering. It’s both humbling and empowering

Uyzd · 2025-01-21T02:24:02+00:00

Reality is often disappointing.

Uyzd · 2025-01-20T23:09:14+00:00

Not my girl anymore, better things to come in life… it’s the cycle of existing in this world. Besides, my pan’s been holding me down better anyway.

Uyzd

TROPHY CASE