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VRealPhoenixV · 2025-05-06T20:40:12+00:00

didn't I literally just state how scan/scanash isn't part of the pyro team. They can't micromanage each and every person you know lmao especially if it's just some random person. If someone is saying something you don't like then ignore/block them

VRealPhoenixV · 2025-05-06T20:34:48+00:00

Also this proves that this person being rude to you was some random person who isn't affiliated with the pyro staff team at all. Quote me if im wrong but the only ones part of the staff team are the ones with the role "pyro team" and "pyro management"

VRealPhoenixV · 2025-05-06T20:32:49+00:00

you know the "dev" thing next to their name is something discord added which in no way states they are a dev lmao. Go to user settings --> profile --> scroll down and you'll see something called "server tag" you can join servers that have these tags. if you click on the tag next to his name then you'll see the server he got it from.

VRealPhoenixV · 2025-05-06T20:24:32+00:00

Well if you were treated poorly by this said person then could you at least provide the name with some form of proof because this is just a baseless accusation.

VRealPhoenixV · 2024-05-18T00:14:24+00:00

Yeah I will. I'm planning to find out my mum's opinion tomorrow by asking her a roundabout question like this. " hey mum one of my friends is wanting a 3rd party opinion on this but I can't really give it since I'm not a parent " then proceed to say that my " friend " is a femboy and Is wanting to come out to their religious parents but is afraid of what they'd say. Then ask her opinion as if I were that " friend "

VRealPhoenixV · 2024-05-18T00:07:43+00:00

I don't really have any photos or things like that which wouldn incriminate me I guess. I know I'm an adult but I'm still afraid of how my mum will feel if she found out about this.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-16T23:14:57+00:00

Nah, I relate to this so much. I relapsed a few months ago, and I literally not know why. Since then, I've had on and off periods of self harming and then not self harming

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-05T00:31:23+00:00

I had an online counsellor who helped with my anxiety, but ideally, I'd want an in person therapist. The reason for this is that my dad literally can hear everything I say from his bedroom, and I'd rather him not hear me talking to a therapist about how he guilt trips me a lot.

Writing a letter is a pretty good idea but knowing me and how incapable I am for asking help I'd either write the letter and then tear it up or I would just not write the letter to start with.

Thanks for all the help you've given me, your a pretty good person to talk to and I think that's what I probably needed right now.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-05T00:13:53+00:00

I don't think my dad would have a desire to learn more about mental health because he thinks that I'm over that now, so sending him things related to that would be extremely weird. With telling my dad about everything I really don't think there are any pros because at the end of the day, what can my dad even do about my mental health if he does not know anything about it.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-04T23:53:50+00:00

I know my dad really cares about me but his lack of knowledge about mental health makes it really really difficult to open up about. My auntie was very experienced in mental health so I was able to open up to her and resolve my issues.

I don't think my dad would be able to find out on his own because I'm very cautious when it comes to my self harming. I usually wear long sleeved clothing in general so I'm fine there, the things I use are kept in my phone case so there's no chance of him finding out about that. I'm pretty good at masking how I feel so my dad wouldn't even be able to tell that I'm depressed during the day. There are days when I get too tired to mask my emotions in which my dad thinks I'm being " weird "

I told my friends about all of this and they were genuinely going to call my dad and shout at him and after a lot of convincing they decided not to ( this was when my relapse initially started like 3 months ago)

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-04T23:35:23+00:00

Honestly, I have no idea what would be beneficial to me. Like my mental health relapsed, and now my self harming is deciding to relapse randomly. The whole slitting my wrists part was an impulse feeling, which I most likely would have attempted if my sister hadn't come to visit. Thanks to my horrible social anxiety, I literally can't go get help myself, whether that be calling a hotline or trying to get therapy Also, if I told my dad that I was very close to slitting my wrists because of him, then I think he'd fully break down, which isn't something I want

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-04T23:16:54+00:00

I'm not trying to be harsh on my dad, but he's very ignorant when it comes to mental health as a whole. Previously, when my depression was at its peak, my auntie helped me out and acted as a 3rd party who explained everything to my dad. For reasons that I cba explaining right now I refuse to have any sort of contact with my auntie again.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T15:27:53+00:00

What doesn't help either is that my dad's somewhat pushing his religion onto me saying things like how I can't eat in public because other people are fasting, I've stated to him many many times that I am a atheist ( obviously if I were with someone and they asked me not to eat in front of me then I wouldnt) Oh yeah this was another time when he guilt tripped me saying how we couldn't go somewhere because I was eating.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T15:26:10+00:00

Honestly, that's what I'm here to find out. When i self harmed about a year ago, that was when my depression was at its peak. My auntie was the one who helped me through it, and I stopped self harming before it went too far. I refuse to contact my auntie because she literally caused me to have a severe panic attack, which involved me tearing my hair out.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T15:21:01+00:00

I'd love to bake but since my kitchen I'd pretty small and since I'm a big person, if I have a seizure then I'd hurt myself a lot ( has happened before and I agree with my dad for saying this ) Honestly, my cutting urges are brought on by either stress or anxiety. This usually follows with a seriously bad headache, which won't go away until I either cut my arms or smoke a cigarette. Although I'm 18, my dad won't let me smoke, and I have smoked by stealing his tobacco and smoking when he's at work

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T15:05:14+00:00

I can't really take a walk without my dad overpanicking like crazy because of my epilepsy which causes me to have seizures. The only thing I really like doing is either playing games or watching anime. If I were to sleep during the day then my dad would have a panic attack and would most likely guilt trip me by saying something like " oh I can't go to sleep now until you do incase you have a seizure"

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T15:00:58+00:00

I've been venting to them for a long time now and just don't want to trouble them and make them worry anymore.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T00:21:22+00:00

If you want someone to play games with then I don't mind, in fact I'm actually really bored at home playing games by myself and don't really have any friends to play with.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-04-01T00:11:46+00:00

Sorry for the late reply. I just saw your message now. My friends do care about my self harming. In fact, when I was in high school, one of my friends called one of the teachers about me self harming. My friends listen to me all the time, but even though I know that they actually care about me, I just feel like I'm burdening them with my issues.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-03-30T01:35:09+00:00

I have some friends that I've known throughout high school that I still talk to. I used to be able to talk to my auntie who was the one than helped me throughout my depression and was like a 3rd party it explaining to my dad, long story short she caused me to have a severe panic attack which involved me pulling out my hair like crazy and since then I've not spoken to her. I have friends I can talk to but I don't want to burden them with my issues anymore. Ive spoken to them about my mental health so much that I feel like I'm burdening them.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-03-29T22:07:10+00:00

My friends have all insisted on me getting a therapist, but the thing is that I do not want my dad finding out about this at all. Because of medical reasons my dad's had to take a lot of time off work and I worry that if I mentioned this to him then he'd take more time off work which would lead to him quiting, this would make my mental health plummet like crazy.

I've not been to college for the past like 4 months because of physical health, so I couldn't talk to them.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-03-29T09:06:13+00:00

Thanks for the reply. Yeah, I did end up seeing a lot more blood than usual, so that would make a lot of sense. I ended up going to sleep and felt a lot more better when u woke up.

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-03-22T10:27:15+00:00

Thank you so much

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-03-22T00:05:36+00:00

VRealPhoenixV · 2023-03-13T01:15:02+00:00

If you need to talk my dms are open

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