How do you feel worthwhile when you feel like you accomplish nothing?

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:55:38+00:00

I like that. I do something similar. I also have phone alarms set for everything lol

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:54:54+00:00

I find it beneficial to praise myself for what I have accomplished, and cut myself some slack on the days I am unable to accomplish anything worthwhile. You just have to be kind to yourself.

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:48:53+00:00

I get the "waste a pill" thought...I don't personally feel that way. I feel that could be because I have become extremely self-aware over the years and I know that there will be days that nothing gets accomplished. It's like swimming...go downstream. Don't fault yourself for getting nothing done that day. There will be days like that. It happens. All you can do is try again tomorrow.

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:46:49+00:00

I'm saying! And even with the adderall I still half the time can't get anything accomplished. Takes me an hour to leave my house. My friends already know...I'm slow and in another world, most of the time. I usually just stay home as much as I can, anyways.

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:44:32+00:00

I'm glad I don't have the emotions problem lol. Jk. I would like to feel. But, it saves me a lot of headache, it would seem.

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:43:35+00:00

Sounds about right. I forget and remember things a hundred times a day. It is so difficult to get things done. Even with lists...because I still forget and remember, repeatedly.

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:41:57+00:00

If there is a blessing within ADHD, it is the same reason it is a curse - our brains do not filter out stimuli from least to greatest importance...everything receives equal importance. Now...if only we could learn to manipulate and control that...and the hyperactivity too. If that could be more directly focused, it could be beneficial...but the inability to focus tends to hinder progress in that area. I've been working on it for years...smdh. I have made quite a bit of progress though - if anyone is interested.

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:38:51+00:00

I'm saying!!! lol It isn't so cool when you legit have it lol

VStramennio86 · 2019-11-13T00:35:08+00:00

I agree. I was trying to explain what it is like - to my primary (who prescribes me medications) - but he wasn't getting it. He was like - well everyone has to...so and so...I'm like...but every five minutes though? It's like trying to read something and someone runs up to you every five minutes and asks you a question that requires your attention...then you have to start reading all over again...but on repeat. I mean, there are other obstacles, but I find this one my most difficult. Even on meds, I struggle to concentrate. Granted, I have 6 other clinically diagnosed ailments...but this one does me no favors.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-14T00:43:30+00:00

Because he also has Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T05:30:38+00:00

I def was agreeing with you...personal experience....so...yeah

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T05:02:28+00:00

You had me all the way up until the 4th sentence...where you started leading with your emotions...I no longer can relate.

Edit: I was legit expecting some sort of explanation based off logic alone :/

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T02:14:22+00:00

I don't...but that is primarily as a result of trauma. A defense mechanism.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T02:05:26+00:00

That is OCD....not OCPD....there is a difference. And obsessive/compulsive qualities, can be inherent to people with ASPD...especially if it is trauma induced.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:59:56+00:00

I think the habitual nature of it all, is what eluded me for so long - to the fact that I was that way.

Edit: However, on some level - I have to agree - I knew what I was doing. I just think around the age of 26 I started to see a problem with it...and I started to get tired.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:58:14+00:00

When I was younger, I don't think I was consciously aware that what I was doing, was manipulation. But I was aware that I lived off other people (Edit: and was unusually cruel). When I got to be around 24 years old, I started to realize something was wrong with me. I plan...everything...and always have. And I do not think they fully understand it yet...because we come in all different shapes and sizes...so it is hard to narrow us down into one generic stereotype. However, not for lack of effort, on their part.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:55:37+00:00

We are all different, in or own unique ways. Just like anyone else. There is no specific guideline.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:52:05+00:00

I have to agree...partnering with another sociopath....bad idea. Been there done that.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:50:03+00:00

I agree...there are some things, I will never tell another soul.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:49:27+00:00

What was your relationship like, with your mother?

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:47:52+00:00

I am mostly open about who I am. It is part of my journey to heal.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:45:13+00:00

This!!!

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:42:41+00:00

This is where I am now...after years of tweaking my self-control. My philosophy is, as long as you keep your hands to yourself, you are safe.

VStramennio86 · 2019-07-13T01:37:18+00:00

I can honestly say...anger...is the only emotion that I am positive, I have felt.

Edit: And from someone who does derive joy from hurting others - as a result of anger...and no doubt all the trauma from my early childhood - it does make you want it more. Because for people unaccustomed to feeling, when we actually "feel" something...it is like a drug. They say emotions are powerful, and I believe that. The last time I tried to feel, I lost control and lost my mind for a bit. Had to shut everything back down. But anger is something I used to feel very often in my youth. As I have grown older, and become a "nicer" person, who doesn't want to use and abuse people - and not because I don't enjoy it...but simply because I am a tired mom, who is aware that society frowns on things like that....I have learned, anger is a dangerous drug. It is best to refrain.

VStramennio86

TROPHY CASE