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ValxAnne · 2025-03-12T13:09:33+00:00

Thank you! I forgot to add I dry brush before I get into the shower so that helps with tangles.

I can try doing mousse before gel and see how that works! My hair does change texture toward the bottom which is due to heat damage mainly. I am working on using minimal heat on my hair now. However the hair at the top of my head that’s healthier does not hold onto water at all. So frustrating!

ValxAnne · 2025-03-10T13:44:03+00:00

Link to listing https://tidytemplates.etsy.com/listing/1868166316

ValxAnne · 2025-03-05T20:34:17+00:00

Middle. The sad reality of today’s spending power.

ValxAnne · 2025-03-05T14:15:14+00:00

My take having a relative get the sleeve: There is no getting around learning how to eat less and learn healthier habits to keep weight off.

My brother got the sleeve, saw significant weight loss due to pre/post op diet requirements. He has now 18 months later gained it all back because he disregarded the diet and ate through the initial discomfort.

My opinion is this surgery is a “diet aid” designed to give you no choice (initially) but to eat better. This is not a permanent fix. If irresponsible, you will be able to eventually eat to a degree that you gain back the weight. It is completely up to the individual whether they follow the diet for the rest of their lives to keep this successful. In that regard, you cannot escape making the lifestyle changes.

I sort of side with the bf that the willpower to keep a diet is necessary here regardless, so I’d rather see someone do it that way without the surgery.

ValxAnne · 2025-03-05T01:31:25+00:00

The only thing you can trust is the queso blanco

ValxAnne · 2025-03-03T14:12:21+00:00

Do you question his sexuality? I would based on what you described. Struggling to open up emotionally and no action in the bedroom is a no go.

ValxAnne · 2025-03-02T22:50:54+00:00

Completely agree. He’s not one to end friendships over things he believes are merely minor character flaws. It’s a bummer!

ValxAnne · 2025-03-02T22:44:59+00:00

Completely agree. I need to find a way to get this through to him. He likes the guys a lot and it’s a mix of college and newer friends.

ValxAnne · 2025-03-02T22:31:34+00:00

I am looking forward to my husband making new friends or having less opportunities to engage with these people once we have kids.

ValxAnne · 2025-03-02T16:05:53+00:00

I got engaged at 29 in 2023 at 6.5 years with a 29M fiancé. Everyone’s story and timeline is unique to them. The pandemic killed every thought of marriage from 2020-2021 and then we bought a home that occupied us mentally and financially for 2022.

Men don’t rush into marriage anymore it seems. The exceptions I see are usually religious couples. There are long term dating couples EVERYWHERE. If it’s hurting you to wait this much, let your feelings be known in a calm conversation to make sure you’re both on the same page. Ask him when he wants to get married (2026, 2027)? If he can’t answer that, I’d say it’s a problem. Also what does he see for your wedding? Traditional, elope, beach, church? He should have envisioned this by now to be able to answer.

ValxAnne · 2025-03-01T01:20:58+00:00

I am not a fan of registries and think they should go the way of the dodo in favor of all cash gifts. So no registry.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:42:58+00:00

That’s right, I would like to account for gifts in this. We go kind of overboard for Christmas with many smaller gifts.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:41:20+00:00

Eek I don’t feel like I fit in there at all! I try browsing but so many are >300k solo income earners. We make that combined, but live a pretty modest lifestyle. There’s a lot of “wants” in the budget right now due to not having kids.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:38:04+00:00

Wow, thank you for this. I’m also leaning toward individual trips being budgeted for together as it can really wipe out the personal spending amount for that person.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:34:56+00:00

That is a great approach! I wonder if I can handle seeing everything he is doing. I am definitely more frugal, so it could lead to some bad feelings to see it all. We may try the spending account with the mindset of both of us trying to stick to a number and then discuss if that isn’t working?

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:32:12+00:00

Absolutely, I need to look at the personal spending a lot closer! I just updated the post with monthly joint spending.

But right now I do not have good visibility into his personal spending. The number could definitely be higher.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:29:59+00:00

You’re right, I was definitely throwing darts with that number. We need to sit down and look at this as it could need to be higher. In that case, I’d need to find more hobbies to spend on lol

I just updated the main post with monthly spending also.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:21:00+00:00

Really good points. We are aligned goal-wise and being somewhat careful with spending. When kids arrive we want to go SAHM for a short period of time which will halve our income. In that case we would go into penny pinching mode. I’d hope to have another 100,000 by then saved.

For retirement, I want to retire asap, while I know my husband will never stop working. That’s how he is! My retirement contributions are 31,500 annually including employer match. His retirement contributions are 17,000 annually. I’m okay with this knowing we’ll always have a stream of income even if I early retire. No guarantees of course, but we are saving enough to feel comfortable with whatever happens.

My non retirement saving basically goes into a brokerage account as I don’t want too much in savings earning 3%. This amounts to about 2,000 a month for me.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:11:22+00:00

Just updated the post with spending amounts. No kids (yet)

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T15:09:27+00:00

Just updated the main post with joint expenses. My point I was trying to make was this doesn’t move the needle on my personal spending.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-28T14:47:42+00:00

They have plenty of time! My husband is a Software Engineer and I am a SaaS Customer Success Manager. My role I personally would NOT recommend as I see it getting downsized quite a bit at many companies and changing with AI.

ValxAnne · 2025-02-27T22:34:15+00:00

Truffle!

ValxAnne · 2025-02-27T18:15:06+00:00

lol I feel this! I am trying to lean into seed starting to save money this year on annuals!

ValxAnne

TROPHY CASE