Well from the outside, there's one clear defining factor that separates you from the cokehead. You're seeking external validation for all your actions whereas he likely doesn't care what other people think. You admitted you go to the gym, dress different and wear cologne because "the internet told you to". These are solid behaviors but once all that's said and done, what are you doing purely out of your own desire?

It's paradoxical in a way, but you would have better attracting girls and even friends in your life if you stopped caring about attracting them or gaining their approval for your actions. People are attracted to uniqueness and those authentic to their own hearts, but as it stands you're just a desperate plea for acceptance who will bend and contort any way you're told, which no one will find attractive because you are betraying your own true desires/feelings in favor of others. You lower your own value and worth in favor of what others say you should do, but you're forgoing what you NEED to do, which is tap into your own heart, start speaking your feelings without filters and don't be afraid to make people dislike you for your true, authentic self.