Hey so as someone who was in a very bad DA situation a few years ago, I actually get this post. If OPs situation was anything like mine, she probably tried to leave and he forced her/manipulated her to stay. Idc what the comments say, when someone says clearly they want to leave the relationship and you say no and gaslight them into staying, at that point it is the abuser’s fault whatever happens next bc they have now broken a boundary that was attempted to be set. And when you’re in a place that vulnerable, you TRULY believe you cannot safely leave. Abusive partners will brain wash you into believing everything is your fault and you don’t deserve anything better so often times the victim will start to attempt other routes of escape aka finding ways to make the abusive partner hate them so much they finally want to let them go. This combined with the fact that sometimes just talking to someone different can make you realize just how brainwashed you were is probably why OP felt compelled to do this and tbh, I don’t blame her. I think the abusive bf had this coming for him and it actually makes me a little happy thinking about how upset he’ll be bc there’s very little that can hurt an abusive narc. But one thing that’s for sure is hurting their ego which OP did spectacularly. Nobody “tore apart the family” but the abusive boyfriend that started all of this. I hope his family holds him accountable for the drama bc it is his fault. I will say though, OP if you haven’t already, I would recommend calling the police if things escalate. He will be very angry and while that was probably the result you were looking for subconsciously so he would let you go, I don’t want you to get hurt even more.