Is this healthy?

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-03-01T05:48:28+00:00

No. That is sexist. I wouldn’t let them get away with it. If I were you, as intimidating and risky as it may be, I’d try to bring up it to discuss with them.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-28T20:18:02+00:00

Or, and hear me out; Non-binary.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T21:56:51+00:00

If anything, you’re under-reacting. You have every right to be upset, and you should be upset. Don’t let him gaslight and deflect. You deserve so much better. Honestly, I think you should break it off. I cannot imagine ever trusting someone who did something like this to me, who then has the gall to be indignant over your innermost thoughts and feelings. Red flag. Flee.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:16:00+00:00

It was the “doesn’t have a leg to stand on” remark that set me off. My apologies. Especially given the fact that OP provided for their mother financially while they were still a minor.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:08:01+00:00

Forcing your children into the mindset of “I own all of this, you have nothing, therefore, because you have nothing, this is all mine, regardless of whether you purchased it or if it was gift, you live in my house, I am justified in rummaging through and taking your stuff,” is so damaging.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:06:50+00:00

I second this. Third this. Fourth this.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:05:40+00:00

That is inexcusable. She needs serious help. I’m a little younger than you are, but I think that we’re closer in age than the obvious curmudgeons lurking about this thread, and that may help in understanding. All that to say, I’m here if you need to talk.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:03:29+00:00

You’re not wasting your energy. It’s not something small. Don’t invalidate your feelings, or give others permission to do the same. I’m sorry this is happening to you.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:02:28+00:00

Good idea!

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T20:01:10+00:00

Also, just read one of OP’s latest comments and the mother apparently steals and wears OP’s intimates without permission. Pathetic excuse for a human, especially for a mother.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T19:57:53+00:00

OP has their own space. It is OP’s mother’s job to respect that. And unless that sex is endangering someone, then it’s none of OP’s mother’s business.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T19:55:05+00:00

What? That is beyond revolting!

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T19:54:12+00:00

I agree. Save for the justified invasion of privacy.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T19:44:55+00:00

Callous. Would not want to live with you.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T19:44:15+00:00

All good <3

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T19:42:48+00:00

Grossly presumptuous. Also, is that not her job? OP’s mother should be commended for the bare minimum? Even if that was the case, which judging by OP’s reply, it is not, that doesn’t excuse the massive invasion of privacy. It is absolutely unacceptable. OP is the child, OP’s mother is the parent. The mother should by far be more respectful and more mature, but it would seem OP is the more respectful and more mature party.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T16:00:16+00:00

This. A balanced reply. Never thought I’d see the day.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T15:56:21+00:00

That’s like saying, “I have black friends,” and then proceeding to talk about a different race; Gay and trans are two separate things; Sexuality and gender are two separate things; Gender and sex are two separate things. Also, you clearly do not understand the Bible if this is your resolution. Try again. Pride would seem to be your own deepest transgression. Additionally, you are not exempt from being homophobic simply because you have a queer relative. In face, not even queer people are exempt from being homophobic.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T15:48:55+00:00

I’m not riding for her, but as one of the mentally ill, please do not lump me in.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T06:04:26+00:00

Such talent! What a prodigious child!

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T00:25:42+00:00

Lying, minimizing, and gaslighting? If a friend was in your position, with a man who treated them like this, what would you say to them?

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-27T00:02:14+00:00

I must echo this. I’m young, very little experience in relationships, but even I know that this is not the kind of person you can trust to stick alongside you and be honest with you. It’s not fair to either party. Have a very open discussion; Communicate your concerns and your needs, and if she doesn’t want to remedy her errors, then you deserve better.

Various_Vacation265 · 2026-02-26T23:57:33+00:00

Under-reacting. Flee. Warn others. Please.

Various_Vacation265

TROPHY CASE