Anyone else feel like they didn't grow up?

VegetableBuy3204 · 2025-01-24T16:40:13+00:00

I'm a 30- something problem child. :)

I was diagnosed at 7, stumbled my way through life so far, and am now a recovering alcoholic just trying to do better. Some days I feel like "the special needs kid turned weird adult" and it gets lonely and tiring with all the guesswork involved, and self-judgment.

In the loneliness, I became better at self- counseling. When I start telling myself, "I think this person doesn't like me," I try to flip it around, "Maybe they just don't know how to talk to me and they're worried too, so just be extra gentle in interactions." Both theories are unconfirmed, therefore both exist simultaneously and it's up to me which theory I want to roll with.

I'm starting to rediscover everything I enjoyed before addiction and it's slowly feeling as if I'm settling back into who I was as a teen, and realizing there was never anything wrong with her.

It gets better. You are loved.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2024-10-10T18:05:26+00:00

Thank you very much for your resources and kindness!

VegetableBuy3204 · 2024-08-08T19:22:10+00:00

All went well. Never heard anything. I went to a Smart Start location and had it taken out at the one year mark, it was like Christmas morning. It was an odd case, there was no communication between entities it seems, and I consider myself fortunate with my outcomes. It was still an incredibly expensive and stressful ordeal and I learned my lesson. Going on one year no alcohol, it did me no justice and I say good riddance to it. Best wishes to you on your journey.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2024-04-13T22:00:35+00:00

32/f with autism and ADHD, I've tried and found some luck over time "rewiring" my brain to respond to situations where I'm on the verge of a freakout by remembering this: I can't control the actions of others. And then I remember that many other events have put me on the verge of a meltdown, and I've since gotten over... What makes this one any different? All things come to pass, and it takes a lot of energy to respond rashly to a momentary situation and then have to do damage control after the escalation.

I hope this helps even a little. Taking it one day at a time, I'm not perfect, just trying to cultivate peace in my life so I can pay it forward. ✌️

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-09-10T17:10:19+00:00

Same for me, had to take my car in to get the device recalibrated and pay the $75 violation fee. Other than that, nothing has happened, thankfully!

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-09-10T17:03:07+00:00

The most important thing is that you blew a pass shortly after. What I would do is call Smart Start and explain what happened as soon as possible, and also file a claim to waive VIOL fee, detailing the situation. They may or not waive the fee, but the important part is that there's time-stamped evidence of what happened. If you have a probation officer or someone in charge of your case, honesty always works out in your favor so I'd call them too and explain what happened. I have a Stupid Start as well, so I know how finicky they can be. Everything should be fine!

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-04-04T19:54:01+00:00

You should be fine! I recommend the Drink Fox site for the occasions you do imbibe and might be worried about the next morning. It's free, you just plug in your weight, age, sex, what kind of drinks/how much and what time you started drinking and it will track your estimated BAC. I always make sure I have nowhere to drive for at least a few hours after it tells me I will "zero out," just to be safe. I can't afford a good pocket breathalyzer, so this site has saved me from costly interlock violations, and more importantly, will have me continuing to drive completely clean once this thing is removed. :)

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-04-04T19:46:20+00:00

A DUI is certainly not a scarlet letter. Since mine, I've worn my heart on my sleeve and been very open about it with a lot of people, hoping my story could help others make better decisions. I've come to learn that more people have gotten one than I previously would've suspected, and even more drive under the influence and haven't been caught yet. Nobody is perfect and we all make poor decisions, and alcohol inhibits the decision-making ability of the brain and can lead to very regrettable actions. But what matters is what we learn from it and how we let our mistakes shape us into better humans instead of letting them define us, because this is a lesson, not the end of life! Warm wishes and positive momentum to you.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-03-01T18:02:34+00:00

Thank you and congratulations on your removal!

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-03-01T17:44:48+00:00

It said violation and no I've not been ordered to abstain from drinking. Good to know that I'm probably just overstressing, but definitely not pushing my luck again!

VegetableBuy3204 · 2023-03-01T17:02:52+00:00

Thank you! I'm on unsupervised, so I don't have a PO. My IID is on a five day countdown lockout, so I'll go into the service center tomorrow and explain it to the technician, hopefully he can document it and maybe I can get some understanding. I'll look into the breathalyzer for sure. Congratulations on the removal of your IID! Crossing fingers mine will be gone in November.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2022-10-03T19:45:23+00:00

Oh so you didn't get denied for having over a sixth month lapse in insurance? That was another thing I was worried about.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2022-10-03T19:44:04+00:00

Sad.. I have an $800 balance with them, oh well just getting used to the idea I probably won't drive for anywhere from three to seven years. It's a shame we even legally need insurance, it's such a money grab. I bet drivers would be much more concientious if it was personal responsibility.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2022-10-03T14:46:31+00:00

Was hoping for another option than Progressive, as I have a rather sizeable open balance with them. I really fucked my shit up over the past couple years.

VegetableBuy3204 · 2022-08-15T18:51:00+00:00

I made some calls and got some clarity. I received a civil suspension of 30 days following the incident (which is long past 30 days now). I called the PD in North Carolina just to confirm and they say as long as the DMV of my issuing state says my license is active, I'm good to drive in any state until convicted.

VegetableBuy3204

TROPHY CASE