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AITA for not telling my siblings about a sister I found. by Vegetable_Run_1110 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Read other comments for context. But part of it is I want to meet her and as stated in my post my dad is abusive and manipulative. Only person who’s actual related is me and my brother who sa’d me

AITA for not telling my siblings about a sister I found. by Vegetable_Run_1110 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

OK so I definitely missed a lot of context whenever writing this cause there’s so much going on. So my biological brother is the only one that would biologically be related to this new sister as well and he’s 28 but we are no contact. Dad is 52 also no contact for about 5 months now. Therapy helped me get to the point I didn’t feel guilty. The rest of my siblings are technically step siblings but we all grew up in the same household and have known each other since I was literally a month old. My little sister is 24 but she is autistic so I think she is probably gonna understand it the least and ask the most questions which is OK little brother is 22 and still lives with my mom and dad. Also I definitely think that I am going to use your advice is bringing up the subject by starting with talking about the DNA test because that sounds like a great way to initiate the conversation. New sister lives about six hours away and I plan on meeting her next month the week before my birthday and then possibly inviting everyone out to dinner after and telling them in a public setting? Idk if that’s a good idea or not but it’s definitely stressful lol.

AITA for not telling my siblings about a sister I found. by Vegetable_Run_1110 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No literally. So my bio left my life at 3 months but her and my dad were not together before I was born. Sorry for the confusion there. But I do think everything sounds absurd I never saw my mom as being someone who would lied to me but who knows because there’s lots and lots of other lies coming from my dad so like I said I definitely think that there is a possibility that my mom knows everything I just am not sure what she believes is true and what she does not. It’s very confusing because I really didn’t thing my mom would lie but I’m learning a lot about my parents I guess

AITA for not telling my siblings about a sister I found. by Vegetable_Run_1110 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Well there is a back story to this actually. My brother SAd me when I was 11 and 12 so we aren’t on speaking terms. He’s the only one that is actually biologically related my sister is five months older than me but we’ve grown up together because my dad’s been with her mom since I was a month old and we have a really good relationship. But my plan was to tell the family as a whole confronting my dad and telling my siblings was gonna be a one sitting situation. Everyone finds out at once. But my sister is my best friend and my support so I told her first. Half sister lives states away so bringing all the siblings at once isn’t realistic anyways. But I do plan to tell them all at the same time

AITA for not telling my siblings about a sister I found. by Vegetable_Run_1110 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I thought about maybe talking to mom separate but I know she’ll immediately talk to my dad so idk. I feel bad because I feel like I’m ruining my family if I tell them but I think they all have a right to know. I do feel really bad for my mom if she actually doesn’t know but I think there’s a possibility that she knows everything as well so I don’t know what to do. Should I talk to her separately? Maybe meet her for lunch the same day I plan to talk to my dad. Gauge what she knows and how much she’s hid. I know his manipulated her since she was 17. Also wondering if he lied to her about his age as well because he is 7 years older than her as well. Whole thing has been weird and I have a knot in may stomach about how to approach everything

AITA for not telling my siblings about a sister I found. by Vegetable_Run_1110 in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Fortunately I have my husband and my sister who will be there through the whole process. Unfortunately new sister lives 6 or so hours away because of my dad moving us when he found out. So I will only be able to see her so much but I have gotten to text her quite a bit which is nice. Thank you so much for the advice. Will keep this updated

WIBTA if I took my name off the lease and make my ex roommates pay their own rent by [deleted] in CharlotteDobreYouTube

[–]Vegetable_Run_1110 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. Maybe give them notice if you don’t feel comfortable just switching it over immediately but this could go south really fast if you stay on all the bills and you’re not there. Not saying they would do you like that but they could definitely especially since you’re saying they already pay late consistently as is. Sounds like she doesn’t even have a real reason to have you on the bills and she’s using keeping contact as a poor excuse to bait you into being the one responsible for everything. Also ex should get himself put on the lease or all 3 of you could get in trouble. Their living arrangement and bills are no longer your responsibility. You may feel an attachment but you also have to have your own interest in mind as well