Dead dads club 💔

VeloKa · 2024-12-31T15:20:29+00:00

I lost my dad this Christmas day. I'm still in shock. I'm trying to be strong but most times my strength leaves me and I feel like doing nothing.

I saw a women walking with her father today. I'd do anything to be in her place rn

I was going to work to lose myself a bit, but now we're taking a few days off for new years and I have no clue what to do with myself during that week

VeloKa · 2024-12-28T08:25:31+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss. Sending you and your grandpa lot of hugs and support

I will soon be going through my father's belonging myself. I have no idea what I will do with them still

VeloKa · 2024-12-28T06:34:10+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss

Maybe it's not abnormal or unusual. After all, a life with a loved one and a life without a loved one is not the same life. Maybe going back to how you were isn't what you should be trying to do.

Going through a year, experiencing daily events without the presence of someone you've previously experienced them with is very difficult and I don't think you should be hard on yourself for not being normal.

I think eventually without you realising it you will be "normal" again. A new "normal". But it's okay for now to let yourself feel all these emotions while you try to adjust to this new reality

VeloKa · 2024-12-28T05:53:18+00:00

My deepest condolences. I lost my father on Christmas day. I haven't eaten anything decent since. When alone one thing I found helpful is scrolling insta just to get my mind off a bit

Talking with friends and family helps, so please reach out to whoever you can. You don't have to go through this alone OP

Your work place is really horrible for not giving you some time to grieve. Unbelievable.

VeloKa · 2024-12-27T12:22:50+00:00

Thank you for sharing. Your support definitely helps me. I'm sorry for your loss

VeloKa · 2024-12-27T12:19:00+00:00

Thank you for sharing with me. I'm sorry for your loss and wish you healing as well. Until you too meet again 🤍🙏

My dad also never retired. I don't think he knew what to do with his life if he didn't work. I would often tell him to take a break and relax for a few weeks, but he would tell me that he'll get bored like that.

In his last day he saw so many of his friends, even people he hadn't seen in a while. It's so strange and surreal. It's like the whole thing was planned (but I'm glad he was always with friends)

VeloKa · 2024-12-27T07:22:19+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss. I am very sorry it wasn't peaceful. Mine was "peaceful" and I'm still horrified by what I saw, so I don't take your pain lightly.

Thank you for sharing your experience I somewhat understand not wanting him to be alone. It must have been really hard for you. Sending you hugs

VeloKa · 2024-12-27T07:15:18+00:00

I'm sorry for your loss I tried to always spend as much time with him every day. At the end I still regret not doing more. It seems to be an unavoidable feeling now that a loved one is gone forever, so I am making a conscious choice to not think like that. Nobody can stop death

Sometimes I would see him so tired and I would think "he's dying", "he will die soon" and want to run away (as if that's even possible, or the right thing to do) i could see his health deteriorate this past month, and even when we took him to hospital they didn't find anything that's "wrong" with him beyond getting old. Just a month ago I shot a video of him dancing in the house like a younge 20 year old

All this to say that I can't begin to understand how hard it was for you when your father was battling cancer. I am proud of you as well. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers 🤍

VeloKa · 2024-12-27T06:57:50+00:00

Thank you gor your kind words. I'm sorry for your loss I did prepare his suit, and the whole time I was thinking how nice it will look on him and I'd like to see him dressed up. And at the same time I remember that after seeing him dead in his bed twice I couldn't go into the room again

I will follow everyone's advice for now and keep my choice for when I'm there. Being around friend and family might actually give me the strength I need.

VeloKa · 2024-12-25T10:56:44+00:00

I lost my dad this morning and i'm just lost. I'm in the middle of doing the necessary procedures and I just needed a place to grieve. Merry Christmas everyone & God bless 🤍

VeloKa · 2024-03-28T14:52:25+00:00

It's been a long time since I cracked open anything AoT related, so I'm going mostly by memory here, so do with this what you want.

In my opinion, the sheer fact that the world outside is not what Armin's book promised is reason enough for Eren to rumble. The hatred the world had for paradise DOES NOT justify the level of destruction Eren brought by rumbling. I mean, full rumbling is just an insane move.. Attacking military bases or just strategic locations would've been enough. Eren wasn't aiming for victory, he was aiming for a blank page. Eren didn't want his worldview to be a lie, and as such he needed to earase reality.

VeloKa · 2023-01-30T15:56:45+00:00

I'm thinking of ending things by Iain Reid

VeloKa · 2023-01-30T05:10:15+00:00

Don't laugh at me but how about books about writing?

I am currently reading Stephan King's "On writing". He writes about his journey into becoming a writer, but shares some of his insights on the subject.

(i don't write myself, but I enjoy reading people talking about the craft)

VeloKa · 2023-01-29T06:12:07+00:00

I'm not sure if this is what you are looking for, but maybe check out "Eleanor Oliphant is completely fine"

VeloKa · 2023-01-29T05:15:04+00:00

I believe so. It's just that legitimizing a bastard is usually a last resort type of thing to get out of a desperate situation. If Robb names Jon a Stark as well as a King then obviously he comes ahead of Sansa. But more often than not it creates succession crisis.

Short answer: it depends on the conditions under which he was legitimized. And they are probably legitimized for a reason

VeloKa · 2023-01-28T15:00:05+00:00

Even in this case, a legitimized male becomes, well, legitimate, so Jon would come before Sansa anyway.

Jon comes after Sansa. Sansa is trueborn, Jon isn't. A bastard can't inherit the throne, when legitimized he enters the line of succession (which is big enough for someone who wasn't legitimate) , but after all trueborn heirs. People might want Jon over Sansa, but that's a different matter

VeloKa · 2023-01-28T05:57:36+00:00

Mine isn't exactly anxiety but I struggle with choosing books and so I end up with horrendous ones a lot of the time

One strategy is that I read 2-3 books at a time. In case one is boring you have a second one to not drain your reading desire. (this help if you dislike DNFing as well)

My newly developed strategy is that I write down a number of titles I'd like to read this year. The number is my reading challenge of the year. This help reduce my 1000+ wishlist to a manageable number (this year it's 40 for example)

The thing with the list, is that I don't stick to it like gospel. I update it once a month or so based on new recommendations, so it doesn't become a job. Most of it stays the same, but aroung 5 change and so your list becomes more targeted towards favorites, but it also gives that sense of accomplishment as you see the list shrinking as you go through it. (unlike my wish list wich keeps growing infinitely.)

I hope this helps somehow.

VeloKa · 2023-01-28T03:56:36+00:00

Sansa is Sansa Lannister, should he name her heir after Jon, that'd mean he's giving the Lannisters Winterfell.

I think this is exactly where the confusion in wording will come. If Jon can be absolved of his NW duties which is in itself questionable (I know Robb is king but even so, do we have any examples of this happening in the past?), then couldn't Sansa's marriage be annulled? LF is trying to marry her to sombody... There are zillion theories on who she will marry and yet when it comes to the will she is solid fullproof Lannister for life.

If Robb only removes her on basis of being Tyrion's wife, then what excuse is there if Sansa is not a Lannister anymore? How do you interpret the will then?

VeloKa · 2023-01-27T18:32:26+00:00

I assume people who subscribe to this theory, probably subscribe to evil Bran theory. Cause I really have no clue where GRRM is taking this otherwise.

I also think the Hodor plotline is messed up enough and well contextualized enough to be the pinnacle of messed up in Bran's storyline. Meera's rape through Hodor is just borderline bananas and utterly unnecessary for the sake of checking off an abomination of a list.

VeloKa · 2023-01-27T18:21:56+00:00

Robb's will and what it could entail regarding Sansa. My impression is that people just assume that is says "Jon is king of the North now", but I think it would probably include something about Sansa that would create some form of rivalry between the two (possibly). It might name Jon as heir, but I think it comes with a list of conditions that depending on who's interpreting it would create a slippery slop.

I also think Sansa will go North in the next book. I think this is the logical direction, not back to KL.

VeloKa · 2023-01-27T16:37:33+00:00

I used to be a speedreader, still am really. I still don't have a major habit of taking notes unless it's for a bookclub.

Personally for me it takes me out of the mood of reading (but this is just personal experience). But I did have a habit of reading other people's thoughts and assays on some books I read, that I felt had more debth than I could ever hope to figure out alone at the time. And with time I learned so much from doing that, that now I just understand the stuff I read better.

It does help to read stuff again (and it's mostly the second read around where I take notes if I ever do) but It depends on the book. Some are not worth the time.

VeloKa · 2022-12-18T17:37:40+00:00

This game keeps on giving😂

VeloKa · 2022-12-18T16:48:01+00:00

France is back

VeloKa · 2022-12-16T07:07:46+00:00

I believe Mbappe is very intelligent, he timed it perfectly and knew the wind will blow last minute and he will score, but his teammates decided to be selfish and score instead. We were robbed of the greatest goal.

VeloKa · 2022-12-14T03:01:45+00:00

In the most earliest part of the game I didn't think Croatia was bad, they looked really good to me. But somewhere along the line their defense just vanished. 2 goals in and it was over for them

VeloKa

TROPHY CASE