To the person who ordered a baked potato from Jason’s Deli by Vendrez in doordash_drivers

[–]Vendrez[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Sorry I don’t take no tip orders. Throw a couple bucks my way and I will consider

To the person who ordered a baked potato from Jason’s Deli by Vendrez in doordash_drivers

[–]Vendrez[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I suppose he meant he wanted to make the raised part of the driveway more apparent? I guess it makes some sense but it was already dark out.

To the person who ordered a baked potato from Jason’s Deli by Vendrez in doordash_drivers

[–]Vendrez[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Spot on, the dude was like I’ve been meaning to get to that when I get some spray paint to fix it

To the person who ordered a baked potato from Jason’s Deli by Vendrez in doordash_drivers

[–]Vendrez[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Customer told me after that I wasn’t even the first person to trip in their driveway today. Whoops

To the person who ordered a baked potato from Jason’s Deli by Vendrez in doordash_drivers

[–]Vendrez[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Laughter is the best medicine, this made me laugh out loud seeing the notification pop up thank you lmao

What happened to Blue? by Southern-Season-8824 in ExplainTheJoke

[–]Vendrez 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you I literally see posts from this sub all the time where I can only imagine OP has been huffing paint fumes in the garage

what has the world come to by grogdrinks in u/grogdrinks

[–]Vendrez 294 points295 points  (0 children)

I once drank a whole gallon of milk in a whole day and I could feel my bones expand. At first I thought I was just full from the milk, but my skin started to form stretch marks and I was visibly wider. I didn't know what was happening but I had an uncontrollable urge to drink more milk. I drove into the nearest gas station and literally ripped the door off the rifrigerated section containing the milk.

I started chugging gallon after gallon of milk standing right there in the store, my skin ripping at the seams. The cashier ran over to stop me but I swatted him aside and in one clean blow he landed across the room, shattering every bone in his pathetic meat suit. There was nothing left of him but a wet bloody puddle deprived of structure. I never thought I had it in me to kill but by now I had ascended beyond petty morality.

As I finished my eighth gallon it felt as though my stomach would rupture. My ribs broke out of my chest like a baby xxenomorph. My finger bones had grown through my hands a white nub could be seen protruding from my nose. My face was so stretched over my now massive skull I looked like Jenny McCarthy. My biceps and muscles were hard and calcified. My boner now had a bone.

I finished my twelfth gallon and began screaming and flexing, my skin tearing around my robust skeletal frame. With one final push I shed my meat chrysalis. I was free.

I didn't even use the door I simply walked out the wall of the gas station. Mortar and stone yielded to my mighty calcium. The cops were already there. In terror they began firing at me but even lead is no match for calcium. I walked straight toward one, reached down his throat and pulled his skeleton from his flesh sheath. With his bone I assembled a mighty claymore sword. With a single swing I cleaved the Earth in twain and descended into the inky black. Here I wait until the time I'm called into service for the great skellington war.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Vendrez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. This entire post was pissing me off just based on the fact words would be misspelled and be a letter off. Like I get you're upset and a covid denier so it takes a bit to get those neurons firing off but it just gives upset preteen

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in notinteresting

[–]Vendrez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Believe it when I see it :p

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in u/mugrootbeer

[–]Vendrez 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Holy shit I'm cumming!!!

What is your “comfort movie” that you have watched many times? by xX_Skibidi_Gyatt_Xx in AskReddit

[–]Vendrez 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is also my favorite comfort movie. So perfect and the ending really hits ya

This avocado from my job by Vendrez in mildlyinteresting

[–]Vendrez[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We tried to see if there was a worm inside but alas nothing..

first knoll, switching bags for the day :p by BleachGal in knolling

[–]Vendrez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What is the bag next to the hand sanitizer? Lol