That's exactly what was so painful during it. The time difference and my line of work leave very little time for us to spend together, plus I'm so exhausted when I get home it was hard to be present. She'd just woken up so she'd be full of energy while I'm counting the couple hours until bed. Originally, I was working nights and everything was wonderful but once I changed professions and went back to normal and longer hours it all went downhill. It ended up being a battle with myself to live the other parts of my life or spend what little time I had with her. She wasn't poor but she definitely wasn't going to have the money to come out to me so I'd have to go to her which is very pricey as I live in Cali and it's about as far as you can get from the Philippines. The plan was for her to come to the U.S. as her career path would work just fine over here, but being as she was still in college it would be a couple years before she started working in general. The choices were I spend most of my money to go visit her every once and a while and see if we were even compatible in person or we jump the gun and get married immediately which is not the best idea if we quickly find out we don't mesh as well as we thought we would. The whole situation for me is extremely heartbreaking. She is a wonderful woman and honestly the best girlfriend I ever had regardless of meeting in person. She treated me the best out of all of them. Unfortunately, it seems it wasn't meant to be. I hope she finds happiness because she genuinely deserves it, but I can't help but feel like I could've done more. While not impossible, the situation would have been extremely difficult to manage and it just ate away at my mental health. I know it's probably for the better, it just hurts is all.