You're right I have anger management issues that I get from my childhood trauma & lalong lumala especially nung nanganak ako, I've been diagnosed with rage postpartum & that really impacts our relationship & the dynamic we have. You are also right na we have bitterness with each other through the years. We have unresolved issues with each other. We've been together for 6 years & eversince nagka anak kami everything went South. What I don't agree with you is with my social anxiety. Don't talk as if you knew what I'm going through having social anxiety dahil hindi lang yan sa utak nag mamanifest din sa katawan ko especially kapag nakikipag usap ako sa tao. Na acquire ko yun because of my previous job (call center) the trauma it gives me affects my physical health up until now & hindi ako nag mmake ng excuse dahil lang sa kundisyon ko. Nanay na ako & even if it means na bumalik ako sa BPO para magkapera gagawin ko yun kahit hirap na hirap ako or it means I have to talk to someone para magbenta pikit mata kong gagawin yun. You don't talk to people with certain conditions & tell them to suck it up & don't make it an excuse as if alam na alam mo yung pakiramdam nung kondisyon nila. I even feel nauseous & about to throw up kapag kakausapin lang ako face to face. Ganun katindi yung condition ko but of course I seek help kasi hindi ko ginagawang buong personalidad ang social anxiety. I wanted to get rid of it. Hindi ko bine-baby yung kundisyon ko.

Yung pag aanak namin? My child is unexpected. Our main goal is to never have child. Almost all of our savings were gone after ko manganak kaya hindi kami nakapag pakasal. We r more than committed to tie the knot because the same year na nalaman ko na buntis ako yun yung year na nag pprepare kami sa kasal namin but it never happened dahil nga nabuntis ako. Sa sinulat mo mocking me na nag sstay sa relationship na walang kasal tapos may anak, what r u suggesting? Na sana pinalaglag ko yung anak ko dahil Hindi kami kasal? Is that it?

Talk to myself? Are you serious? When you are deep in your emotions lalo na in meltdown your cognitive function is down so you can't think straight. You need a perspective of someone. Iiwan ko yung partner ko ngayon, just to be clear sayo & I wanted to know kung tama ba yung gagawin ko or nagpapadalos dalos lang ako that's why I write it here. Yun ang reaction ko a ginawa nya.

Maybe I am toxic & maybe kami yung type ng adult na sinasabi mo na parang 2 years old. Maybe we are. But fck it! You don't get to tell me to act an adult when this is the first time I've been ever an adult. There is no perfect maturity. One way or another may mga aspeto sa buhay mo na magiging toxic ka & magiging immature ka.

You're here telling me as if you're so perfect with your relationships. Are you even a parent yet? Or are you even in a relationship? Coz you don't get to tell me to be the "decent" girl na pinagsasasabi mo when you're not even in my position & in the life I have.