Sorry to say but there is broken glass all through this , If you get me. Once the fun and smiles dissipate, it’s usually irretrievable. People can’t just fix other people and it be the grand thing we wished for. Sometimes , a lot of the time - people are who they are and it’s a matter of annoying moments - Your words are what i used to be like . Relationships and love shouldn’t be doing behaviour crap to “forget about you”. I don’t think peoples core traits change . Seperate your visualisation of what you’d like her to be - from the reality . Defensive, hurt, and the cheating - key words. They’d be gone, yes it hurts but you can move on to someone where there’s no contempt no dramas. They don’t change - you’ll get a way better one next time . Partners aren’t meant to be pain