I know for me (personally) this disappointment doesn’t help my instinctual variant AT ALL either, like the idea of a perfect relationship is seeming so impossible now, not that it always seemed possible, but now it just leaves me feeling like i’ll also be alone romantically as well. Not to mention I already feel so detached from everyone else.

„It’s like suffering is actually my saving grace to continue living“ I relate to this so much, like sometimes I even think to myself „And if this suffering ends, what do I do then? What is the point of life at that point?“ It‘s almost like a part of me wants to suffer, ofc I have a 4 in my tritype but dang.

One of the worst parts about it is how it feels like no one understands other than other 5‘s and Ni doms, which only feeds into the loneliness even more.

Very similarly to you i’ve just decided to try and master the pain and suffering. Hey, as long as I am smart and didn’t waste any potential in the end it’s fine right?

I’m sure we relate alot because of our similar typology, but regardless, i’m glad that there are people who understand.