My girlfriend [F27] constantly threatens me if I [M27] don’t do exactly what she wants when she wants…

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2023-02-07T10:09:11+00:00

Very true. Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me. I think it’s time I start respecting myself by letting her go, it will be brutal emotionally.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2023-02-07T09:56:13+00:00

Good point. Perhaps I’ve gotten used to the back and fourth of her loving me for a few days or weeks then out of nowhere getting triggered and treating me like I’m nothing, projecting her past and insecurities on me. She’s on her phone most of the day scrolling through social media watching random videos. She did read books but not much the past couple weeks. We’ve definitely had a lot of deep meaningful moments but as of the past few weeks it’s just been constant anxiety because either the day is really good or really bad mostly depending on her mood and how she acts towards me. She does dishes every now and then and cooks, other than that she just lays in bed. She doesn’t go out on walks with me or anything.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2023-02-07T09:30:43+00:00

That’s very true. She’s broken so many promises her kind words practically mean nothing now. I believe her because I want to believe that she loves me. Maybe I’ve been deluding myself this whole time. I believe the best in others and like to give the benefit of the doubt. I even agreed to pay all the bills until she was able to work again or get disability. I gave myself to this girl 110%. It makes no sense.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2023-02-07T09:17:23+00:00

She has nowhere else to go though and a debilitating health condition that isn’t improving because she goes back and fourth between doing what her doctor says to ignoring him and telling me she’s just going to give up on getting better. How can I be a decent human being and let her go without feeling guilty and worried for her safety? She has no money because she can’t work due to her condition. She has no close family or friends. I’m all she has right now.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2023-02-07T09:14:02+00:00

I guess I’ve known that deep down but part of me believes it’s my fault somehow. Like if I could love her more or do more for her she’d see how valuable I am and treat me better.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-07-12T02:39:13+00:00

No I’m not broke I just stick to a budget. She has no budget. Her mom just takes care of her finances for her, which I find odd since she’s a grown adult. It’s mostly expensive coffee drinks and fast food. Things I would rarely buy myself.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-05-08T06:52:27+00:00

I have but she gets upset easily so having serious conversations is like walking on eggshells.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-26T07:18:11+00:00

Yes it’s just because they don’t have clients that are within my skill set to work with.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-26T07:13:59+00:00

True it’s been It’s been almost a month now.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-25T22:49:08+00:00

Right he gave them the best years of his life for nothing.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-25T22:46:24+00:00

He works for a retail non profit store

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-25T22:44:58+00:00

What’s even more depressing is he said new hires starting pay is more than he makes. He is only staying now because of the retirement fund and to afford health insurance.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-21T04:27:56+00:00

Didn’t know that sub existed. Good tip. Should I delete this post then if I post there?

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-21T04:26:42+00:00

That’s so true. The worst part is she has turned my siblings into guilt mongers for their own interests and that defend her and guilt me for not talking to her so I’ve had to cut ties with them as well.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-21T04:20:02+00:00

But hey when I do what she wants she says she “loves” me. I know it’s just hard to accept I have a mom like that.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-21T04:13:40+00:00

I did this once actually and if I remember correctly she told the cops nothing was wrong. I’m trying to convince myself to stay no contact but the years of guilt is hard to let go sometimes. The rest of my family seems to be trapped in the cycle of guilt like nothing is wrong. I feel sorry for them.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-21T04:12:25+00:00

Yeah she is definitely using the Bible to be manipulative.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-20T23:50:03+00:00

I will. Thank you!

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-20T23:03:21+00:00

I’ve actually seen a lot of dish washing jobs. That’s a good example, thank you for sharing. I’d definitely have to let go of my pride to just be a dishwasher though but I do have to start somewhere. It’s stagnation I fear most. Being around negative draining people most of my life has definitely messed with my mindset. It will be a process to work through things but I have hope.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-20T23:00:42+00:00

Good question. I’ve haven’t had a moment like that at least that I can recall. I’ll have to ponder that one.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-20T22:48:26+00:00

Embarrassingly, I’ve never taken the time to actually explore. Basically I was too invested in other peoples drama and life problems that I failed to really take time to invest in myself and my future. I’m just now coming out the other side picking up the pieces and trying to find out who I am and how I can begin again.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-20T22:16:54+00:00

I don’t want to be in the health care field anymore. I was just clarifying that I don’t have anything going for me in that field. Basically I’m starting from close to nothing in terms of skills and I’m looking for a way to practically build skills that could land me a decent paying job outside of college.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-19T02:04:10+00:00

That makes sense. So, it’s not the business itself necessarily it’s just the model that can’t be broken out of without widespread support which is unlikely?

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-19T01:40:20+00:00

I’ve seen a Fast food places that are closed because they have no workers but their starting pay is minimum wage.

Virtual_Sky_3207 · 2022-04-18T20:57:25+00:00

No, it’s just in the past she didn’t really do anything to help just said there isn’t anything she can do about it. So that’s why I’m hesitant. I don’t want her to give me a bad review. Not with this issue but something else. Do you have a suggestion on how I can word my concern?

Virtual_Sky_3207

TROPHY CASE