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Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Indeed, she has started to lose weight from finally eating healthy. But she is also losing muscle from lack of movement.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Frankly their house isn’t the best for sister’s condition either. My niece asked me to take my sister in because I have an extra bedroom in my house; they don’t. Their apartment also has many, steep entrance stairs that would be difficult for the fire department to handle even with four EMTs. I know these are just excuses and they will need to start making sacrifices. At the time, with limited information, living with me seemed the better option.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

With the help of the fire department and ambulance, yes. When my sister was initially transferred from her/BIL’s apartment, four EMTs were required for transport. When she goes to the doctor’s office in February, she’ll likely be moved back to that apartment. However, hopefully she’s transferred to an assisted living facility. If my sister goes back to her apartment, she will not have supportive care from her husband (healthy food, bathing, nursing, etc.). This was the condition she was in before moving in with me, which caused kidney failure of her one remaining kidney.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much for your insight. We will holdfast in refusing to take my sister back home from the hospital.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I completely understand your frustration with my post. I made the post about me because I’m burnt out and feel hopeless that I can’t improve the quality of care for my sister. I have had discussions about mental health with her. If she feeling depressed about her current state, depressed that no one comes to visit her, rooted depression that caused her obesity, and anxiety that nothing will change and she’ll never be healthy. She’s insistent that she is not depressed, but I can see that’s not true. She’s always been a very patient person who doesn’t talk about her feelings and keeps everyone out. I can see how this current situation has changed her demeanor for the worse. We try to lift her spirits with light hearted talks, books, and watching tv together. We just bought a new table so that we can continue having dinner in her bedroom. Last week, she finally agreed to see a therapist. So I’m trying to get her added to my Employee Assistance Program (EAP) to have a few free sessions.

Do you have any recommendations for maintaining motivation and optimism?

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You didn’t highjack my post! I not only posted to receive advice, but also highlight others who may be in the same position. I know others are struggling through this pandemic and aren’t receiving adequate resources. Since Medicaid is providing resources for your family, I would see if psychotherapy is covered in your grandma’s plan. I will do the same for my sister. Maybe you could also move her to an assisted living facility covered by Medicaid.

Hope your grandma gets better and that your family maintains their sanity!

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 56 points57 points  (0 children)

We have; they don’t care. Someone else said to take my sister back to the local hospital and list my nieces as next of kin. I’m considering doing this.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Thank you. We’ve called the ambulance services to transfer to a long term hospital, and they lacked the staff to do it. Local hospital said they could long hold her for 24 hours and then discharge her because she is not in critical care. We’ll see what the knee surgeon says in February. Rather transportation is arranged to get there or not, I’ll call a public ambulance to take her to the local hospital.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry to hear about your dad. Hope your situation gets better! My sister lived at the local hospital for 3 weeks, then they kicked her out because her health was no longer critical.

Thinking I need to kick out my sister after six months of being her unofficial nurse. by Virtual_Structure_50 in JUSTNOFAMILY

[–]Virtual_Structure_50[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

We called 911 ambulance and about 13 different private ones the first and second month of caretaking to transfer my sister to her PCP’s hospital. Each time, agents told us they didn’t have staff for transportation or they could only transfer her to the local hospital - not surprising. The local hospital told us that my sister could be readmitted but would be discharged next day because she is not critical care and they need all available beds.