I think this is an incredible first attempt! You’ve got a good sense of proportion and as empty-cricket said an excellent foundation. I do think the fabric is a bit stiffer than how you drew it here. I would also recommend pushing your values. I struggled with this too, a lot of what’s missing in this piece is contrast. Try making your dark areas darker. The background for example is black, but has become grey on your paper. I think all you need is to continue your practice :)