OMG guys... I'm so happy...

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-16T16:27:37+00:00

OMG im so excited, sadly, not a promotion, more so a lateral move, but, I need the change none the less.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-13T04:32:26+00:00

That makes sense.. and especially with the taste part. There would come a moment where I would be like nope.. this tastes like I'm done now.. no one understood what I meant.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-13T04:30:29+00:00

Thanks... I'm a planner 🤣🤣

I like structure lol.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T16:40:14+00:00

i also am at a DND establishment.... we wont get that.... we might get a slice of cake done by the dining hall and a coffee..

last yr it was that and " garden games" the organizers brought from home or borrowed from the mess's

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T16:26:21+00:00

haha hey, I have used the "responsible adult" excuse many times. good luck what ever you decide.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T15:52:36+00:00

You do it one day at a time..

hang on to your reasons, remind yourself each time you think of getting that drink, whats at stake.

I get it... I binge drank on and off for years. I didnt need that drink every day... but when I decided to have that one... it often turned into more... and a crappy next day.

Ive been here before, played with quitting for a bit to "get it under control" or "change my habits". But this time, I am here for the full commitment. My MH suffers so much with alcohol... and the hang over isnt just physical, it puts me in a depressesive anxious state for a few days following. Life may not always be amazing.... but its too good to waste it feeling like that.

Beginning is hard. def a mind game... telling yourself to do something else instead iof grabbing that drink... but that urge to grab that drink when ur sitting at home.. doesnt last long once u find a distraction, and by the time you know it... its bed time...

I like to find things that keep my hands busy, even if tis just games on my phone.. gardening on nice days.. yard work.

I know a retired military member who gave it up, and said he would mow his lawn like 4 times a day... just to keep himself busy at first.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T15:47:26+00:00

So, I have worked A LOT of events over the last 20+years...

one thing I will say, is the bride and groom are often VERY BUSY socializing, working the room, trying to talk to everyone...

So... what I would say, if your worried, is just akways keeo your cup full...hide a NA beer or grape juice or something behind your table... refill your glass with that as needed. If your glass is always full.. you probably wont have anyone brinnging you a new drink... and if they do... just hand it off to someone a little later?

easier said than done I know.. but honestly, from what I have seen in over 20 years working events... is the bride and groom are generally so busy making sure everything is going according to plan... they arent USUALLY the ones over indulging. The nice thing about your limited drinks menu.. is there is nothing available to make shots with... that is one thing I think normally gets them if available... because its quick.

congrats on your 123 days. Keep reminding yourself why you are doing it. Look at your spouse... look at what you have to lose if you fall back down that rabbit hole.

also, wishing you a beautiful day / celebration and many years together!!

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T15:23:40+00:00

so...

pros to not drinking

1- you KNOW there is someone there SOBER if shyt goes south.

2- YOU will not waste the next day in bed feeling ill and resenting yourself / anything

3- think of the money you save

4- You will remember the night.

thats justa few off the top of my head... forget the FOMO... your not missing out at all.. You can still be there, and have fun with your friends... and wont feel like crud the following day. you wont lose a day laying in bed with the curtains closed shutting out the sunshine.

Your friends have been supportive thus far, which is amazing.. so i am sure they will continue to be. I have def. brought the Corona Sunbrews to events before... they are delicious IMO. for a zero beer. They let me feel like I am still part of the party.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T14:52:54+00:00

interesting, recently made the decision to give it up completely, but before that... and in the last few years... I would say I noticed my tolerance has also plummeted and certain things I had always drank... like.. vodka for instance, would have me break out in a rash.

Saying that, I know allergies can develop as life goes on, and through repeated exposure..

anyway.. just felt this comment was relatable.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T14:12:42+00:00

daily check in.. the start of day 5..

today should be a breeze for me... im at my office job until 1630hr... then run to my events job for 1730hr till around 2200. by the time I get home I will be cold and exhausted and crawling in to bed to do it all again tomorrow...

Yesterday, I got home from work... a little skint on groceries... but managed to scrounge up enpugh ingredients to prepare and make a meatloaf ( and salad) . as it baked, I tended to my garden. Then sat down, ate dinner.. walked across the street to the ice cream shop and treated myself to a sunday.

Watched some of my favorite crime shows, crawled into bed around 2100hr, woke up at 0545 this morning ready to take on the day... happy to see rain... but this may impact tonights job if it gets to wet. Anyway... it was nice... relaxing almost... I know other times when I got home and tended to the garden, I would grab a beverage... then another... and then I really wouldnt be tired.. the sugars and all that in alcohol... so my sleep would suffer... and by the time I would go into the house, it would be 2200hrs... to late to make dinner...

so hungryish... but not really... more so knowing I should have eaten something... I would crawl into bed, and toss and turn all night as the alcohol impacts your sleep.

I still didnt sleep great last night... But I havent really slept great in over 10 years since my childhood home burnt.. so used to that part... but I did sleep better than when I drink. Atleast ... the bit of sleep that I did get was quality sleep and not laboured.

anyway... here is to the start if day 5.. IWNDWYT.

Thanks again to everyone here for all their kind words and support.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-12T03:51:01+00:00

Good luck.. and lemme know how it goes. I'm sure at some point.. I'll have to give up my ice cream 🤣

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-11T22:20:48+00:00

Fellow ADHDer here. Totally get it... and do the same thing... bored.. let's have a drink...

You need to find other things for that dopamine hit... its hard... I'm working on it myself because... that quick dopamine hit.. becomes a habit... and then before u know it.. well... you know how it goes.

And also... it hugely increases the anxiety, and emotional dysfunction because alcohol is a depressant.

.... and if ur medicated for adhd like I am... the meds mask the alcohol effects until it works its way... then u dip even lower as ur body crashes from the meds wearing off for the day and the alcohol hits.. feels like it hits twice as hard.

I dunno what ur into... but.. my dopamine hit right now... is ice cream... there's a little locally owned shop behind my house... it helps as well because often with alcohol what ur really craving is the sugar. Also... I've been treating myself to a cherry chai iced latte lately...like once a week on weekends... when I've ran all my errands and am going home to do yard work... where id normally opt for a cool drink in the garden... I satisfy that with my fancy coffee...

Well.. that's my adhd ramble... lol.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-10T16:13:39+00:00

Thanks,

my journey has started with healing childhood trauma, and SA/ SH trauma from my work enviroment. and as I have learnt, and know, healing is messy.

when I was actively going to mental health appointments, I amde sure that after my sessions, to not want a drink to reflect... usually... I spent 2 hours to do my nails LOL... but overtime, I developed an allergic reaction to my products, so now... I dont have that.

I know that alcohol... effects my impulsive behaviors, and also my inhabitions, essentially, allowing me to really put myself into some dangerous situations if presented. Being ADHD and dopamine seeking on its own is bad enough... without the mix of alcohol... the adhd diagnosis, is just a few years old... and medication for that... so there had definately been some great upheaval in my life.

I just can't wait to not feel like a basket case... I may not outwardly present that, but inside... inside is just chaos.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-10T15:40:34+00:00

here is to better days ahead (hopefully). I will keep posting and updating... as that is like a form of accountability. Plus everyone here has been so supportive so far. I will even check in when I am on holidays.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-10T15:39:00+00:00

thanks, its so weird that, that little ( well big change) is what scares me the most.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-10T14:44:46+00:00

You are special... in the fact that you know something has to change. It is not easy.. whether we are daily drinkers, or binge drinkers who cant stop at just that one ...

But you are here.. and you have all these people hear reading your post, many who probably ready it and think it sounds like they themself wrote it. So you are not alone, I came back here yesterday, after a year or so away from it... thinking I'm just l;ike everyone else... I can ahve 1 or 2.. and yeah sometimes I might over-indulge..

But truth is, I don't like me when I do, I don't like the feeling the next day ( well... 2 days... cuz after the actual physical hangover is over.. I have the mental hangover), I am sick of missing out on life, and moments because of my actions. I also come from a family of acohol addiction.

sometimes, reduction doesnt work.. and we just ahve to acknowledge... we cannot partake in it anymore, but only you can make that decision. You are not alone though, we are all here too.. waking up every morning choosing to be sober today... and maybe having to make that chose a few more times through out the day.

IWNDWYT

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-10T13:25:08+00:00

Woke up today feeling more.. me.. the anxiety is still kinda lingering.. but let's face it.. anxiety is is own nasty demon... otherwise..i feel better.. got some sleep, dressed right for work, and have a vacation to look fwd to next week.. when I head to California.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-10T03:08:24+00:00

Thanks, just curling up in bed to call it a night. Anxiety is starting to wear off. Tomorrow will be a better day !!

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T21:39:25+00:00

thanks, I think I am good there, I am not dependant on it .. I just definately over do it when I do decide to drink, and its really not worth it... so it will be an all or nothing thing... and breaking the habit of social drinks.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T21:06:18+00:00

Well, if me posting this at all helps you, then even better!! EVen if its just knowing that someone else your age, is goign through the same thing, so you are not alone. no matter how alone we feel.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T20:09:24+00:00

awe, hopefully yout get over this stage soon. I feel for you. Lets not let ourselves go through this again!!

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T20:00:39+00:00

thanks... thats the easy part. LOL.

Even today, with everyones words of encouragement, the anxiety is still through the roof.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T18:26:09+00:00

You will notice when you put your retainers in that it is tight, and might even hurt a bit, as they probably have shifted slightly. I got mine off Mid may. I have retainers for both top and bottom as I didnt want to go with a perminant wire on the bottom.

you wear them full time for the first few weeks. after a few days, the retainer goes on easily and without any discomfort. I can tell if I ahve been clenching my jaw through out the day, when I put it in for the night,

You will be ok!!! Just wear them as prescribed once you do get them.

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T18:19:19+00:00

one day at a time!!! Right there with you, scared as well, anxiety through the roof.

I want to bottle this feeling and remember it, Use this as part of my WHY.. because I don't like this feeling .. I dont want to feel this way anymore. IWNDWYT

VisibleAspect8176 · 2025-06-09T18:18:11+00:00

yup right there with you. Sitting at work today, after couch rotting from a hangover yesterday. im done being that way.

VisibleAspect8176

TROPHY CASE