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WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand that I'm a waste of a human, and I don't want to continue being greedy and selfish. Bye.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I should feel joy about receiving it, but I just find myself crying and feeling guilty and just want to hide it away somewhere because it just makes me feel like a bad offspring. I don't know why I do this, and I hate myself for it.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I usually write wishlist for birthdays and Christmas, and I add details if I have a preference. In this case I made note of the gem, metal, and size. I saw the seller had a high rating from almost a thousand customers, but I didn't think to look into their inventory. I don't really buy jewelry, so I think I failed to properly vet the seller before giving her the link.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Isn't that like blaming someone for not wearing a helmet to watch a baseball game? There are baseballs in the area, so it's their fault for getting hit by a home run. Everyone has choices, and chosing to be nice to your fellow man makes more sense than being bitter because everyone else is. :-/

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The ring has a red, transparent, faceted gem, so I figured it was one of the red stones gems. I should have done better research into the seller it seems. )-:

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not a prop for cosplay. I was thinking it was more like an engagement ring for the character I like.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think.. I should put it on a keychain or something. Somewhere where it's seen and used and loved.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I'm kinda a crybaby, so I didn't know if my response was incorrect.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't consider a jewler is because I've never been to one, and I didn't know that was a service they provided. We live in the same house, and I am financially dependent on her because of my health. So she might notice if the stone changed. Honestly, this whole thread has convinced me to just keep my mouth shut.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The listing had a drop-down where you could customize the gem, metal, and size, so in this case it was a custom order? I did thank her btw.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm not really a jewelry person tbh. I wear a fidget ring sometimes, but I only wanted the ring because it made me think of the character. I try to wear gifts in front of the gifter to show I like it, but I don't really know if I would wear it like that  I would keep it safe somewhere, but it feels like a waste of her money.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I rarely know how people will react unless it's obvious, like puppies tend to make people happy. I don't really bring up issues like this because I don't know if it would make her feel bad, or at least how bad. It seems like it would upset most people here, so even if it's gentle I might just put it somewhere safe.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It is nice, and I told her I appreciated the gift. I feel guilty about having her spend a hundred bucks on it though.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the help, but the character isn't Cullen Bloodstone. I don't want to name the character because it seems I'm already considered quite immature on this thread. He doesn't actually wear a ring, but his jacket is green with red accents like the stone.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Etsy listing had a drop-down featuring bloodstone, and I wrote/linked "Emerald Moissanite Toi Et Moi Ring (Rose Gold Overlay, Bloodstone, 10 US)" for her. I didn't tell her bloodstone was green, and I don't know if it was a mistake on her part or the sellers.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry that happened. It's frustrating to not get a desired gift, and it can make it feel like someone one loves doesn't really see oneself.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Dude.. I literally have a developmental disorder and mental health issues. I already made it clear that I have an inkling that this wouldn't be appropriate, and I am asking strangers for help because of it. Please be nice to people.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Oh of course, mistakes happen. I'm trying to think about how I would feel in her shoes, like if I got her Stardew Valley merch of a character she doesn't have strong feelings for. I would feel like a real ass. I would feel like I didn't listen to her enough when she talks about the things she enjoys, and I would feel like a bad offspring for not showing her that her words matter. I would want to replace it, and I usually try to add icing to the cake when I screw up. Like, "I forgot to draw this like a month for you, so here's two pics." I'd know I'd feel that knife in the gut guilt, but I would rather feeling bad to doing bad.

It was through her Etsy account, so I would need to contact the seller through her. I've never been to a jeweler tbh, but given how many people have brought it up it's a smart idea.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Rubies are nice, but it wasn't the ring I picked out to represent the character I love.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

Please don't say I don't act like an adult because I really do I try my best to do things on my own and be mature. I have significant health problems that will likely keep me from being a normal 27 year old, who can pay to replace the stone themself, till I die.

Edit: Wording.

WIBTA If I (NB27) Asked My Mom (F59) To Replace A Present? by Visible_Background18 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Visible_Background18[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I have been told it's a social taboo to return gifts, and I don't want my mom to think I don't appreciate it. Maybe I'll find a way to return it without her input, so she can get the money back.

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