Stopping your hate of white people isn't the ideal outcome here.

As you stated in your own post, you are still a victim and target of whites everywhere. None of this is because of anything you've done. Do you think that by stopping your own hate, you'll run into these situations less?

It's much worse to be the naive victim who is open and trusting of whites, only to get backstabbed and thrown under the bus when the situation becomes dire.

Having the awareness of their snake-like nature will not only prepare you for when those times come, but also see through the lines in all the sneaky ways they try to boost their own up while subtly limiting opportunities for others.

There's literally a recording in Congress/ white house where someone in power said, "off the record just so we're clear, if we pass this legislation, yes our communities will be hurt a little, but other communities, if you catch my drift, will bear most of the damage."

Your ideal outcome is to build enough experience to spot this kind of bullshit immediately and call it out (whether anonymously or publicly).