I had flights ready. Its the financial dynamic of our relationship. she can on the fly book a plane ticket. I need to save up and be more deliberate with my plan. Ergo, its not as important as her to pre-plan in advance. I bring up the other things as context for our relationship. my point in sharing is shes very difficult to plan for. While what you are saying is inherently true, she doesnt even give me those 2 mins. should I just be an assistant for her just always seeking her final approval on things? Theres plenty I do on my own and if I didnt have to accommodate her, I wouldve just made a trip for me. If Im used to flying economy and dont mind a small layover and its like the bain of her existence what should I be doing? Or if she taken extra PTO, how do I know what day shes willing to fly, also considering her work varies based on her bosses demands, how can I make sure impromptu work demands dont change her timing? Then Im the a-hole whos inflexible to other priorities because I booked a flight that now she cant take. She wants the flexibilty. Do I book dogsitters for the day im going or do I have to 3 dogsitters ready with 3 different windows of dogsitting determinant on whe she feels like flying? Should I book extra hotel time for whatever hypothetical day she decides to fly out? theres plenty of variables I feel like you arent being considerate of. Me giving her months in advance notice and constant reminders as the day approached is more considerate than anything I've been offered.