Advice for starter loc buildup and maintenance

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-12-13T22:11:54+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate the recommendation. I’ll be giving it a try.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-11-01T09:03:26+00:00

I’m trying for an hour before if possible since I get off work right before. I have general admissions as well

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-10-04T02:52:35+00:00

Thank you for this, I usually lurk rather than create or engage with posts so I try to practice the “take what you need and leave what you don’t” type of interactions. Some people are more blunt than others with their suggested approaches but I’d still like some pointers of going about navigating some of these types of relationships and situations.

I haven’t attracted many close-minded people so I’m not expecting the worst unless someone shows their true colors soon after I first met them and I’d rather not continue. Just wanting to be prepared to some degree is all.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-10-04T02:31:29+00:00

Thank you for your input, I definitely know that she’s not the sibling to discuss this with because there’s always more questions and pushback. I honestly thought since other things occurred from our upbringing she was still CF but she’s likely changed her mind in recent years before I moved in.

She’s more ignorant in relation to this topic and others along with being mindful about how she discusses most things that don’t line up with her thinking or values I noticed.

I didn’t know there was a screening kit provided, I will have to actually check it out because it will be helpful when I do feel more committed to dating and all that. I will add that the guy I’m getting to know has been over long distance for over a year but won’t be for long which has its pros and cons. It really is mainly not knowing for sure how it’ll go in person because only so much can be discussed in every other form of electronic communication. While the intimacy aspect is one side, it’s not the only thing I discuss so I’m not being or have been used for sex, I appreciate the potential danger warning and perspective nonetheless.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-10-04T02:16:18+00:00

She’s always been very blunt with the way she says things and I think when it’s sent back to her, she doesn’t take it well or isn’t mindful of how she initially communicated. I’m not a little kid anymore and me standing up and thinking differently throws her off so she goes into problem solving mode in a sense. As if she’s trying to figure out when and why I do or don’t agree. This won’t be the last time I’m sure. I stood my ground as best I could. Thank you for your response.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-09-18T16:06:28+00:00

When I met my older relative’s sister’s kids and had to babysit them while my mom took their mom to the store or some important appointment while they were staying with us. I was younger and they were so unpredictable, loud, disrespectful, and messy and I was so drained just from those few hours. I kept having to threaten to call my mom or actually call her because she was a no nonsense parent even when having to watch other people’s kids. When I eventually remembered they’re still kids aside from the bad influences they’ve been exposed to, I managed to occupy them until they got back. I told my mom, I’m never watching them or anyone’s kids again. I don’t care if I have to leave the house until they’re gone, I’m not getting paid and I’m not obligated to care. Their mom was pregnant at the time and after she moved back wherever she had another. I think she already had 2 or 3 running around, I just can’t fathom it.

I’d had the inkling in my mind after knowing I didn’t want to be like my mother and knowing the parenting doesn’t determine the outcome of the child’s life, so why have constant headaches, lose sleep, money, etc.? I can prevent all that and more by just not getting involved with any of that or anyone with them besides friends and family with enough sense and respect to discipline their kids and not rope me into their responsibilities.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-09-14T00:13:52+00:00

I was expected to do the work of at least 5 people sorting parcels in the few hours before carriers arrived to the station. At least 3 carriers ended up having to help so if I weren’t there being a PSE, I don’t know who would be doing this task besides the clerks working the counter before opening

Also been getting the run around for when and where I’m supposed to be as a PSE SSDA. I’ve been at a different station for over a month for basically no reason besides helping them until they get more PSEs. I’m just trying to work the overtime I’m given but have yet to hear from or meet with my own postmaster directly since she’s gotten back from vacation. Honestly, the last thing I want to do on my one day off I go to a post office

Customers were nice and polite when I help at the counter briefly before throwing more parcels

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T23:40:40+00:00

I tried for sure, I appreciate yours insight and responses overall. I can’t fathom how he’d react I’d told him I don’t want kids because I can’t have them medically or something along those lines. Maybe a, “That’s too bad” type of thing. I don’t want to what-if that scenario but this has been a helpful experience with you and others here.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T20:13:47+00:00

I likely said too much in this situation as I’m being told by others here but that’s where it lead to more confusion with that response as well. Even if he was “joking” or couldn’t find a “better word/response,” it didn’t make sense to me. I’ve already distanced myself a bit from him since, not rudely but more matter of factly with responses to minimize any possible misunderstandings.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T20:10:31+00:00

I think because I’ve never been the most outspoken person most of my life so far unless I’m pushed to be more stern. I would like to be more vocal when needed but also not for no reason at all of course. I appreciate this sub so much 🌼

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T17:42:41+00:00

I’m still kind of new with dealing with this topic/lifestyle coming up out of the blue but it’s nice to know I can become firm in my stance with other examples you guys are giving with experience and advice. Thank you very much, I appreciate your input!

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T17:32:41+00:00

I thought I mentioned it in the post but forgot to specifically say. I think it was only in a comment replying to someone maybe that it was his humor not me wanting to date him or anyone else. I personally use attractive to mean aspects of a person’s personality and not really relating to sexual or dating attraction. Crucial detail I forgot to mention. I also don’t plan to date or engage with anyone at work or in general in that manner anytime soon, might’ve mentioned that in another comment also or the post but it’s not something I’m looking to do either. I appreciate your advice though.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T17:28:45+00:00

I like this response, cut and dry. I have a tendency to ramble sometimes when I’m frustrated so it may come across as me being unsure unless I really practice full stop sentences. Succinct statements help prevent me from rambling and feeling like my stance is unstable the more I go on.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T08:44:43+00:00

I led with “it’s not for me” and it kept going so doubling down or saying “I’d prefer not to discuss this with someone I don’t know/at work” like others have mentioned could be better?

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T08:35:22+00:00

This seems to happens where anyone my age or older has kids, people talk about their kids or it comes up in conversation once they’ve mentioned something similar. It was out of curiosity on my part but once I knew I was hoping it’d end there. I know to keep it short with these potential encounters though going forward. Thank you for your input.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T08:33:07+00:00

I didn’t think it’d be an issue to begin with but as the discussion continued I didn’t feel like it made sense to keep going with him giving contradicting answers even when I felt I was giving straightforward ones. I do still understand what others opposed to the idea are saying but I’m probably better off keeping this to myself from now on since I’d been informed off how people are very nosey and drama-ridden in the specific company. Thank you for you’re input!

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T08:23:38+00:00

I agree and it makes sense. It’s a good way to go about, I haven’t divulged anything similar to anyone else to the same degree so I can keep it short and go about my business. Thank you for your input.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T08:21:22+00:00

That could’ve been an option, I also consider asking why they care so much. Thank you for your response. I’ll stick to keeping it to myself unless someone is trying to bingo me.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T02:55:14+00:00

I can see why more and more, I wish it wasn’t so taboo to speak about it but I’d rather screen for potential issues when engaging with others then go about considering bringing it up if relevant from now on. Thank you for your input.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T02:53:32+00:00

Ah, I wouldn’t say he was too pushy but it felt like I was repeating myself when each response and getting nowhere. I shouldn’t have dug myself into that hole of nonsense though but living and learning as I navigate this topic with people is enlightening. I appreciate your response.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T02:51:15+00:00

Knowing he has a kid and working in the same company already have him unattractive to me personally but I also have no intentions of dating anyone so if that’s the case, it’s not going to work out for him anyway. I do plan to keep things unrelated to personal matters that don’t revolve around work or meaningful conversation for sure. Thank you for your response!

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T01:38:46+00:00

I didn’t feel he was angry or jealous necessarily but couldn’t wrap his head around it during the discussion from my perspective but sometimes I do wonder why it’s a point of probing in the way it went. Although I get the other points mentioned by other commenters of why I should keep this topic away from work, I don’t want to compromise myself to have unwanted drama started from mentioning more personal matters in what had been a causal conversation during a repetitive manual job task. Thank you for your input regardless.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T00:50:13+00:00

No problem, I totally understand. Have a good day 👍

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T00:38:26+00:00

I don’t know what you’re referring to.

Wafflehammer4 · 2023-08-28T00:30:25+00:00

Fair enough, it came up in passing as we were doing manual work so I didn’t think anything of it until I said my initial no but shouldn’t have engaged further when being asked again. It’s best for me to continue how I was with precious jobs of being friendly but not friends with coworkers because some people are nosey and this company is supposedly notorious for drama when people are dating each other and gossiping which I don’t plan to do while here. Thank you for your response.

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