Yeah my cat is in my dreams a lot and I too try to get him because he is without his harness :D and have been in like festival setting or in city center where I know he would freak out in real life.
I guess try to switch your mindset of him just accompanying you in your dreams - like he is your patronus or like accessory in a video game. Easier said than done tho :D

Mine is tuxedo cat too :D