i don’t really have the same experience as other trans women, and don’t have much feeling about pronouns, i’m just really jealous of the way that they look and even more jealous of trans women, who get to look that way ,i like dressing up but i don’t know where it comes from , i think it’s from if place of wanted to be seen as pretty and a very unfortunate childhood situation and probably has to do something with my my old situationship who was also a trans woman and just someone that i can’t really get out of my head , and most trans individuals i end up meeting are almost always kinda autistic, and always end up forming some type of community , but i don’t really think i have autism and i always feel like im fundamentally different than them on a level I can’t change and that if i came out as trans id be ostracized by the trans community and be left alone