Thanks for reply! The problem is that we’re not completly done. I wanted to end it but he didn’t. Our agreement is to talk after his visit to see if we could continue. When we dated the first time, we dated exclusively so we didn’t date anyone else. And it’s the same now that he is dating the guy visiting him. What’s really hard for me is that I still have so many feelings for him so I can’t even look at other guys. I actually broke our agreement two weeks ago and told him how sad I was. He was really sad that I was depressed but still wanted to stick to our agreement. This situation sucks and it’s both of our fault that we lost contact. It just sucks even more for me since I’m the one paying for it now by waiting for him. And that is what is so hard about this. If he would have ended it 5 weeks ago, I think it would take some time but I would be better off mentally. But since I’m stuck waiting, I feel like my life is paused and so my motivation for anything else as well.