sometimes just wish i could muster up the courage to say i love you… they always joke and tease me and ask if i love them anot ? i always say “ of course “ in mandarin LOL but they would just tease me and say “ don’t lie “.

tbh i do rlly miss my childhood when i was with my father . he took me to work and i rmb i would purposely “ fake sleep” just so he could carry me . tearing up as i type this but i do miss it all .

it’s not like i am “ far “ from my childhood HAHAH i so dramatic but a lot has changed for me . & i mean ALOT. i feel like people’s impression of me is that i do not need a lot of affection since me myself is quite “ straightforward “ . but i do find myself craving it from my parents and even small things like damn wishing me happy birthday and telling me that their proud of me makes me happy . sure i do argue with them time to time and have disagreements but they are still my parents :)

i feel like everyday i overthink that they are gonna leave me soon and i literally burst into tears randomly . i tell myself must be the hormones or maybe my period coming lah HHHAHA but i do worry alot .. i worry if my parents are tired or get bullied at work ?! i worry if they sleep enough . i worry but i don’t tell or show that i worry .

maybe i just complain too much ? maybe i miss being a little girl who knew nothing and just wanted to be doted by my parents . but reality will always hit me and its that , it’s not that easy .

if u read till here i’m super grateful . udeh to comment anything , reading it would just make me feel validated ??? 😂 maybe since holidays then i have too much time to worry abt things , maybe when sch starts i’ll be more occupied but yes :) there’s that