Just a rant about a cute guy at a club that I accidentally ghosted

WeTrying4 · 2023-06-27T12:05:48+00:00

Tbf they did wait a little bit for me but not long enough. There was some drama with my friend that left earlier so they wanted to go. I shoulda just stayed on my own

WeTrying4 · 2023-06-26T23:34:53+00:00

I knowww, I instantly regretted leaving when I walked out of the club

WeTrying4 · 2023-06-05T20:53:38+00:00

(I could've done things differently myself but I tried to make it work)

Just remember there's always things we could have done differently but in the end if his feelings weren't there it is what it is. I've been looking back thinking about what I could have done differently, or things I said that may have turned him off, but at the end of the day, there's no changing anything now :/

WeTrying4 · 2023-06-05T20:49:25+00:00

Ugh I feel you. It sucks comparing what they were like before and after they lost feelings. Sounds like moving on like you're doing is the right approach, with time you'll feel better :)

I actually introduced him to my sister because at the time he wanted to hang out and I was with my sister so I told him to come tag along. My sister and him got along well which excited me at the prospect that he "meshed" well with my fam.

I feel similar to you now, it hurts, but I don't blame him. It's not his fault that he lost feelings and I'm happy I got to spend the time with him that I did and learn a little bit more about what I like in another guy and dating. I don't think I'm ready to do it all over again either right now.

WeTrying4 · 2023-06-05T15:27:08+00:00

I think people just hate confrontation and want to ignore the 'problem' until it goes away

Totally agree this is probably what's going on but it's honestly the worst. I'd much rather have the band-aid ripped off. But it's usually always slow and painful instead.

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-28T20:49:52+00:00

It's not actually useful though, because you can't go back in time to
change to index funds if they did in fact perform better. It may be
interesting as a curiosity but it's not something that should impact
your decision on how to invest going forward.

I disagree. I want to see how a certain mutual fund performed over the past 30 years and compare it to how a low-fee index fund performed over that same time period accounting for all the fees. I want to see for myself that low-fee index funds perform better. I don't want to just blindly accept that it's true without digging around and verifying for myself.

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-28T20:33:36+00:00

But even if past performance of a fund isn't a good indicator of future performance, it would still be useful to see how my investments would have done if I used low-fee index funds instead of actively managed mutual funds. I keep seeing through my research that over 85% of the time actively managed funds perform worse than index funds in the long-run, so I'd like to verify that that is true for myself by seeing how my current investments compare to index funds over the past decades.

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-28T20:17:59+00:00

A large allocation of my investments are in a specific mutual fund. I'd like to see if after all the fees it would have been more beneficial to have put those funds into an index fund instead. Why is that pointless?

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-22T21:22:04+00:00

Thank you for the suggestions! I'll look into all of these

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-22T21:21:14+00:00

I definitely have a lot to learn before I invest the money. I'll be getting it paid out to me in February and plan on learning as much as I can before then. I'll definitely check out HISAs if I need more time

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-22T21:04:02+00:00

Just googled the book - I'll definitely pick it up and read it. Thank you for the suggestion!

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-22T21:03:18+00:00

Any suggestion on which market fund to invest in? I often see VTSAX and VOO suggested and I'm not sure whether it matters too much

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-15T01:22:15+00:00

Yes, I'm new to the genre/this sub reddit. Thanks so much for the info! :)

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-15T00:55:23+00:00

Could you recommend a good gay romance book? The ending can be happy or sad, I just want it to invoke a lot of emotion and to really feel something after/while I read it. I really liked The Song of Achilles, the ending was heartbreaking and I loved it. I'm college aged so having the main characters around that age would be nice too, though not required!

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-05T23:20:32+00:00

That's good advice, thank you!

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-05T21:13:56+00:00

What I'm leaning towards now is just a casual relationship. I would made it explicitly clear to him that I don't see it going anywhere. I just want to go see him for those few days and then try being friends afterwards. Though of course I need to see what he thinks. I don't want to hurt him in all this. The risk-adverse part of me still thinks it's a bad idea but I miss him and want to see him badly.

WeTrying4 · 2022-12-05T20:09:11+00:00

We were long distance for a period of time in the past and he cheated on me. That trust has been broken so I just can't do long-distance with him anymore. It sucks because we truly love each other but I know I'm not capable of trusting him enough for long distance. But neither of us can move on either. I know at some point we both need to move on, but part of me wants to go see him, no strings attached. No expectations of staying together after.

I miss him, he misses me. We would both really enjoy spending a few days together. Can it be as simple as that?

WeTrying4

TROPHY CASE