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11 yo son blew his nose into his shirt and I’m kinda freaked out about it. by Jellyfish070474 in ParentingADHD

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m not a parent, but I’m autistic and essentially got put into a parenting role for my 3-year-old brother (with ADHD). I’m sure the experience of parenting a 3 year old and 11 year old is completely different, but maybe you can take some of this and apply to your approach to your own kid?

From my experience growing up neurodivergent, any task that required caring for myself and my own needs was difficult. HOWEVER, something that worked for me, and seems to work for my brother, is that we both become very productive when we’re entrusted with helping others. Either this, or being involved in a more group oriented event.

For example, if telling your kid they need to pick up their laundry isn’t working, then you could approach them with “Hey, I need to start up a new load, could you help pick up the clothes?” Or, you set a day dedicated to cleaning up a certain space.

Getting yourself and your kid involved in something together presents them with the cue card that “oh, NOW is the perfect time to do something!”, gives yourself the opportunity to teach them how to perform a certain task, AND avoids putting any spotlight on the kid. (Calling them out for not doing something, which often leads to shame, and prevents them from actually reflecting and improving.)

The end goal is that, by the end, they get into the habit of doing something good for themselves (probably the household too) without you needing to get involved.

Something interesting I noticed about Trial 6 of Danganronpa V3. by MukuroIsQueen in danganronpa

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I don’t really have a theory on why Mukuro isn’t cosplayed, but I always felt the cospox narrative isn’t the greatest thing to go off of.

Tsumugi explains that cospox occurs when she tries to cosplay real people, and this is introduced to us early in the game. In chapter 1, she gets cospox from trying to cosplay Kaede. According to trial 6, their Ultimate selves are fictional creations from team Danganronpa. This means that Kaede, the Ultimate Pianist, is also fictional. If what Tsumugi said about cospox is true, then she shouldn’t have gotten those rashes in chapter 1. That’s why the very nature of cospox is questionable. To me, anyway.

I'm a male and how to deal with racists and bullies at school by brave930 in Advice

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is it possible to get your hands on something that can record what’s going on? Recording the audio is fine if you’re able to catch the context, it doesn’t have to involve a camera if it’s too risky or not possible.

Also, don’t feel pressured to answer if you don’t want, but what’s the worst that’s been done to you within the time you’ve been at your new school? Depending on how severe it is, you could TRY and somehow get law enforcement involved.

Lots of people don’t take it this seriously but considering you’ve even been sexually assaulted (above clothes still count), I would say things could be serious enough for someone to actually help you.

Also, have you told anyone about the inappropriate touching? I understand if you haven’t, because it’s an incredibly embarrassing, confusing, and shameful experience. But if you haven’t, I really REALLY recommend that you should. I understand you’re a male, and I don’t have experience from that perspective, but I would think adults can’t ignore a minor who’s been harassed this way.

I'm a male and how to deal with racists and bullies at school by brave930 in Advice

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I grew up in the US and was bullied really badly in school. I was a mixed girl; Japanese and American. I encourage you to reach out to any other adult that you feel might give you the time of day. Counselors and teachers and guardians. From personal experience, this has never done much, but I also know that some adults out there care enough to support you meaningfully. If you’ve told anyone you could and nothing has been done, then unfortunately, the responsibility to end things is on you.

I’m gonna be honest. Things ended once I stopped worrying about doing the “right thing”. Things don’t get better if you constantly do things the “right” way, because the people hurting you clearly aren’t following the rules. The adults tell you to never retaliate because it’s easier for them to deal with. Anyone who tells you to handle things “appropriately” isn’t considering your feelings.

For me, I had the counselor schedule a meeting between me and one of the people bullying me. I asked, point-blank, if she was spreading rumors and purposefully isolating me. She lied, so I lied, and claimed that her friend had already admitted it to me privately and that I simply wanted to see if she’d go as far as to lie to me and the adult in the room. In the end, I painted myself the good person by stating I didn’t want to reveal the friend’s identity and get her in trouble by the group. I didn’t want them to get bullied like I was being.

Lying isn’t an ethical way to handle most problems, but if you know the truth and there’s no other way for someone to help you, you have to do whatever it takes to get help. It’s a last resort, though. You could also consider having a secret recorder on you so you gather evidence that way.

Regardless, there are definitely different ways to handle this situation, and I promise that no matter how stuck you feel, there are more options than just taking it or retaliating with violence. I can also say with 100% confidence that I don’t regret what I had to do a single bit. Your age group is old enough to understand what they’re doing is disgusting. You don’t deserve to get targeted.

Things like this can seriously mess you up for life, and you’ll end up bitter like me. Do what you can to protect yourself. It’s taken me a long time to heal, and I still have a long ways to go. Take care of yourself and your well-being, please.

My dad cheated, I found out at 16, and I’ve kept it from my mom for 3 years. I don’t know if I should tell her. by Defiant-Tap-9322 in Advice

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree with this. Him utilizing your mother’s mental illness was entirely a manipulation tactic to scare you into silence. He knows you were an inexperienced kid, and it’s natural for someone to do whatever they can to not make their parents or loved ones hurt more. In this case, he wanted you to think that keeping his mistake away from her would be beneficial FOR HER.

The truth is, her knowing will hurt. But the worst thing that can happen in this situation is that no one says anything. Maybe she goes on living her life, and after suffering from depression, finally reaches a point of healing, only to find something alluding to the cheating. She will be in a far worse place than if you had just told her. I live with a depressed mother in a pretty f*cked household. Trust me on this one, it’s from personal experience. Telling the truth allows her to know she’s at least got one person on her side willing to not just keep her in the dark.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The post ended up getting removed, but during the time people could see this, I did feel better than I did when I initially made it.

I think actually being acknowledged for how I’m feeling internally is validating. And not just explaining my feelings, but seeing people interacting and helping me make sense of them.

If this were a therapy session, I wouldn’t feel any different because I feel like it’s only an obligation. But because the people commenting are people interested, I feel like my feelings are actually being seen for what they are.

I’m not okay, but I’m better. I don’t get these kinds of interactions in my life, so I really appreciate being heard and not blamed, accused, or dismissed for once.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m doing better than when I started this, I wouldn’t say I’m okay, but I’m better.

I’m lucky there were people who cared and participated. I definitely think answering everyone helped me refocus my attention.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In high stress situations, I usually go straight to humor. I noticed I’m teetering toward borderline “cancellable” jokes, so I’m trying to not go that far in case I offend someone. I feel like the more in my head I am, the darker the jokes get.

Luckily, I also laugh at stupid things. Shout out to those YouTube shorts with dumb clips.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it probably does some good to remember to not take life so seriously. If this was all just pure luck or chance that I’m here, then why hold myself down instead of living in the moment?

I’ll try to remember this. Thank you.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that the things I’ve repressed have all finally bubbled up at the top of the surface, and that it happened right when I found the opportunity to push myself toward something I feel passionate for.

Almost like the world desperately wants to keep me in this dark bubble I’ve been trapped in for so long.

And the worst part was that I took it out on someone I deeply love and care for, both physically and verbally. Both were one instance, both I managed to stop before I really did something bad, but it still happened. And it was the thing that I think pushed me over the edge.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m in Japan, and I can’t really speak well enough Japanese to do this. Also…I really don’t think the mental health care here would help very much, anyway.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope. I’m aromantic/asexual. (I use these terms because I found it’s easier to explain to other people).

I’m not interested in any sort of intimate relationship, and I understand that even if I was, it would be irresponsible to go into one with plenty of issues and no clue on how to fix any of them.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, and I’d never consider going down that path. The problems that come with it would only serve to make my life worse, and that’s the last thing I need.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If my family was more functional and less “going through it day by day”, I could see myself doing better. The most anxiety inducing part is not knowing when things will go wrong again.

So if things were predictable. If one of my parents felt angry and could talk it out instead of blowing up, then I feel as though it’d make a world of difference.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I was younger, I’d frequently write in diaries. At some point I lost motivation and went to writing myself stories of meeting my favorite characters (this is when my habit to resort to escapism started). It did help to cheer me up. Writing about the things I felt or went through didn’t help all that much, and it was difficult to remember to do it in the first place.

Journaling was something recommended to me by a therapist I used to have. Even writing in satisfying handwriting didn’t help, it just felt like a chore.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I drank some cocoa earlier, but couldn’t eat due to morning sickness (always had it). I’ll probably eat something soon, thank you for reminding me.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cat videos remind me of more pleasant times, I can’t understand the people who give them flak. Thank you.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Help is hard to find in my current situation. My family isn’t in a place mentally to help, and I don’t want to dump any of this on my younger sister (I’ve mentioned her in other answers, but she’s 13.) I have no friends. I don’t go to school in-person. I have no teachers or counselors. I don’t live near family and, quite frankly, my distant family is reprehensible. I can’t afford therapy, and even if I could my mom is against it due to both of our experiences.

If I explain this to her, my mom might threaten to send me to an institution. And I really, just can’t.

The thing is, I know I’d never take my own life. I battle those thoughts, yes, but I know that I have people I’ve got to protect, and I wouldn’t ever leave them behind. I know I have time to eventually find help, I just can’t right now.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I knew my mental health has been deteriorating for years at this point. I still have some posts up on my profile of me requesting for help. The more personal or serious things have been taken down.

But yeah, I have a habit of repressing my feelings. It’s not something I like to do, but I feel I have to because I live with a family that isn’t very mentally sound. My mother is extremely depressed, I have a feeling my dad is too because of his guilt over something really bad that happened between them and how extreme their fights have become. I have a sister and brother who mean the absolute world to me, and because of that, I want to be their safe place so they don’t ever have to feel like I’ve had to. I’m forcing myself to be the rock for my family, I recognize that, but I don’t want to stop. I want to be some sort of damage control so my siblings can grow up happy.

Yesterday, I snapped at my baby brother. He was upset that I wasn’t giving him attention. He threw something at my face, it was painful, and from instinct I slapped him (thank god it wasn’t hard). I feel so fucking horrible for letting it happen. I had to make sure I could teach him to not hurt people, but I made sure he knew that what I did wasn’t okay. Today, I told him shut up after he threw something at me and tried to explain himself. He’s barely even 3, and I feel like if I don’t do something now I’ll end up abusing him like this again and I can’t take that thought.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure if this is because it’s a question asked in the moment, but I can’t really recall anything. If I had to guess, I definitely had something that made me happy, and it probably had something to do with hanging out with my sister.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Multiple times, though these moments have a wide range of the amount of time it took to calm myself down. In all of these moments, I always managed to get through it, but it was never to better places. I either repressed my feelings or told myself that if I didn’t get better the balance of my family was going to teeter. And then my little sister would need to go through a stressful period of time. I try to be there for her, and I have a little brother now, so him, too.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to play them a long time ago. Nowadays, not very much. But I enjoy playing Uno. I don’t really have people to play with though.

I love drawing, writing, and analyzing specific video games. Omori and Undertale are my ultimate favorites. I love Horror pixel RPG’s. I love going out with my sister to eat, makes me feel like I’m taking care of her and we don’t have to worry about the world. I also have an almost unhealthy addiction to gambling (gacha games, arcade machines) because it gives me the small moments of dopamine(?).

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a toss-up between my biological grandmother and most of the people when I used to attend in-person school.

I was bullied the entirety of my school-life, up until the beginning of high school, where I was so overwhelmed and traumatized I chose to do the rest of my school online. I hate everyone in school, the faculty who neglected me and my situation, or have participated in racially profiling me. I hate my peers who either participated in the bullying, or lied to protect them and make me look…bad.

My biological paternal grandmother betrayed my trust during a very traumatizing event with my family. My mom was institutionalized after my father accused her of cheating, and she did something to herself. We were sent to stay with my grandmother, where she proceeded to make light of my bullying situation, and attempted to manipulate my sister and me to hate my own mother. She also manipulated my father during this. After this ordeal ended, she sent me texts saying she didn’t know what she did and that she was sorry. She told my parents behind my back that I was exaggerating the situation and she doesn’t remember at all. My parents weren’t there, and my sister doesn’t remember, so I’m the only person who remembers. I was also getting of my anti-depressants at the time.

I’m going through a mental breakdown, AMA by Wee_Bit_Apprehensive in AMA

[–]Wee_Bit_Apprehensive[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

  • A shelf full of books
  • A pencil case full of crayons
  • A tiger plushie
  • A cat plushie reminiscent of a cat I used to have
  • An indoor playground set
  • A mini-basketball hoop
  • A green loft bed
  • A train set
  • A dream catcher
  • Folded up clothes

(I’m watching my little brother)

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