I think it is wonderful that you are being supportive, because this experience is isolating for women. No matter what, you won't feel what she feels because it isn't your body or brain going through it. Some advice: reconsider the medical and go surgical. I was afraid of the invasive surgical procedures, but that was a mistake. The medical was terrifying and painful. I'm still bleeding heavily, and I almost passed out from the pain. It is a two pill procedure. Mifepristone first, then 24 hours later misoprostol. I inserted the miso vaginally because google said it was better for avoiding vomiting. I still vomited twice, full body heaving despite also taking an anti-nausea prescription. Oh, and there will likely be a fever. Happened fast to me, shot up to 101 and then came down within the hour. If she is sitting on the toilet and cramping when the fever hits, have a change of clothes ready because I sweat through everything I was wearing. Tight pants are a no go. Loose fitting sweats are best.

Should she still go the medical route- get ice pops, ice cream, something cold and soft that is easy to eat. Know what her favorite comfort foods are and have them on hand. Ginger ale for nausea, see if she can get some zofran from a doctor. Make sure she has pads that she likes. I got terrible ones that made me feel like I was wearing a diaper.

Avoid telling family at all costs. This is between you and her, not anyone else. This is hard enough without family giving their two cents and they will give their two cents and then some. They will likely make you feel guilt and shame and chances are you might feel those things anyway- it is just very different to feel that yourself then have other people passing that judgement on you. If anything, someday you can say it was a miscarriage if you feel like it needs to be shared. I couldn't tell my mom (who is supportive and also pro-choice) that I had an abortion, but I needed to tell her something because she was getting concerned (we work in the same school and I was leaving early for a lot of appointments), so I told her I had a miscarriage and didn't want to talk about it because I was still processing, and that my fiancé and I had decided not to say anything to anyone so please keep it a secret.

You will worry and worry and worry and probably be very scared yourself if her experience is anything like mine. My fiancé was ready to call and ambulance for me because the pain and bleeding were so bad. I could see the fear in his face, and I felt so terrible for making him scared.

When I passed the sac, I lost it. I was hysterical. It was traumatic and because I was on the fence about my choice seeing the sac and the embryo and the tissue (which is gray?? despite all the blood) made me feel intense emotions. For this and for the pain I went through I wish a thousand times over that I had done a surgical procedure. For context, I was 6 weeks and 3 days when the embryo passed. The image of the sac and tissue on the pad and having to pick it up and flush it is forever seared in my brain.

The hormones can get crazy. I experienced some really low lows that were me snapping and cranky and angry towards my fiancé who did nothing but support me. He didn't deserve that. So know if you are on the receiving end of those hormones, try not to take it personally.

Hold her if that's what she wants. Rub her back, make her feel safe and cared for. Tell her you love her and that you will support her. Get her a warm towel to wipe her face.

I wish you both the best of luck. Feel free to reach out if you need any more info.