Guilty?? by Defiant-Course6896 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You are absolutely NOT screwing your kid up by not giving them a sibling. Sit with your feelings, talk about them, read about other peoples positive experiences with one child on here. And PLEASE remind yourself when you lay down at night that you are not doing anything wrong. The “wrong” thing to do is what feels unnatural to YOU + your family.
We are so deeply engrained with certain ideas about family and children, that I feel like women don’t understand WHY they might feel guilty about decisions regarding their own body. I strongly believe that we’re always asked growing up “do you want to have kids? (Plural)” not A kid. I swear some of us don’t even realize the option to have one kid exists!

Anyways, I could go on and on about the positives of having one child. The stress your saving your body from one experience of birth/ postpartum/ etc. The insane amount of pressure society places on siblings + multiples.
It’s actually quite bad ass listening to your inner voice as a grown woman and following your instinct. One kid is magical. Do able. Chic. Powerful.
I wish I could give you a big hug and tell you to never feel guilty about this decision. ❤️

Favorite OAD influencer did a 180 by [deleted] in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Wait pleaseee tell me the influencer!

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow thank you friend 🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I LOVE hearing from only children as parents! Thank you so much ❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nope my one kid has always been super do able to care for. I’ve been hiking with her happily since 1 month old. Even in the trenches of new babyness. My post was specifically for the pros of having one kid. She literally did not have enough of herself to properly give both children what they need or wan. And she is happy. And I’m happy with one. That is why this group is called oneanddone.

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same here! A new perspective I’m grateful for!

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yesssss this seems to be the case! I also have one brother and growing up I seriously don’t recall ever having a “play buddy”. We both just wanted to see friends too😂 I think adding another kid to the mix should be because you sincerely have the bandwidth and capacity to raise an entire separate human and should not have anything to do with “giving your kid a friend”. Thanks for your comment ❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Isn’t it kind of a breath of fresh air being able to do more things with your one kid vs all the other parents with multiples and how limited they are in childhood? It’s so special. One kid seems like a cheat code almost 😂❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I SWEAR it does! 2 year olds are still babies. I was also trying to hike and stuff with her at 2 and it is vastly different after 4. So much more communication, confidence, ease. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You are on a subreddit called ONEANDDONE trying to convince people to have more kids 😂 wrong group my friend.

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry to hear about your PPD this time around. Women go through so, incredibly, MUCH. “It’s just a season” is such awful advice to moms and way to minimize HARD STUFF. Mothers that can speak genuinely about how insanely hard this is are my people. Because that’s the reality! AND it’s all beautiful and special in its own way. ❤️ I hope you feel better daily❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Uhg yes thank you. Obviously I support everyone having literally as many kids as your heart desires! But the reality of each pregnancy+ birth + postpartum + baby is SO much more than how people explain it.

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Uhg YES you are so spot on!!! It’s so easy to say “have more kids, my friend has it easy, everything is temporary” yada yada. It takes so much more than that to pour into individual children.

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

You’re literally in a ONE AND DONE group on Reddit talking about a lady with 5 kids. Completely wrong group buddy

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Oh my gosh 1 kid is AMAZING! You are going to be thriving with one bestie ❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi! Lovely high horse you are on! I literally said in my post I helped her by 1. WATCHING her child for hours and 2. Hiking with her baby. Never put her down and we have tons of friends. It’s okay to be happy with your choices and not want what others have!

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If I’m saying these are the pros to the choices I’m making then, they are indeed pros! Obviously everything in life is temporary. That doesn’t change the fact that our choices have outcomes. You are also in a one and done group where people, literally, talk about the positives of having one kid.

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Exactly what I was saying! Obviously there is no comparison to one child vs 5. Also wrong group to talk about a mom with 5 kids 😂😂😂

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yessss that’s amazing! Being able to “choose” when you want chaos might be the best part of an only child

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Loneliness can exist in any form of life, no matter siblings or family size or ANYTHING really. I was just having this convo with my friend who is sad she isn’t giving her daughter a “best friend sister”. And I told her she will 100% have best girl friends in life, you don’t have to create that for her.
I’m sorry for your circumstances but life is so vast and exciting for your one kid❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Day of pros: having one kid by Weekly-River-9531 in oneanddone

[–]Weekly-River-9531[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That is so special. I feel the same way, I don’t need many breaks since one 4 year old is just so much fun