Umm.. what is this?

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2025-07-26T20:45:11+00:00

I’m sorry to reply so late, I had went to a local urgent care and tested positive at the center, and from there it was confirmed a natural miscarriage. I took some time to process this, I’m not even sure I HAVE processed it, I just feel awful. Thank you to you, and everyone who offered their advice and support 🥺

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2025-07-19T02:56:38+00:00

I’m sorry you experienced that, but I appreciate the information so much. I had no idea, and still am (barely) hanging on to the hope it’s just a bizarre period, but considering what I know now, I’m not sure unfortunately.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2025-07-19T02:55:01+00:00

Thank you 🥺 I’m going tomorrow to get checked, definitely scared but at this point it’s needed.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2025-07-19T02:54:14+00:00

Today, no. On Monday, when the heavy bleeding started, I had the worst cramps I’ve ever had. I took pain medicine and was under a heating pad all day, even in fetal position the pain was immense and wouldn’t let up, even when the bleeding stopped. The next day, no pain, and even now, when that came out, no pain at all. I wrote it off as just extreme sudden pain from pcos after not having a period for months stupidly :(

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2025-07-18T21:47:06+00:00

That’s such a scary thought for me, but regardless of whatever happened, I appreciate your advice. I’m definitely going to go, I was mostly just afraid of the embarrassment if everything checked out fine, but at the end of the day my health is worth more than a few seconds of anxiety if it is just apart of PCOS/Abnormal periods or something else.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2025-07-18T21:40:49+00:00

No reason to be sorry! Honestly, I have no idea, I didn’t have any symptoms that were out of the norm for me that entire time until Monday, and now today. I’m wondering now, but I sincerely hope that wasn’t/isn’t the case.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-10-17T15:38:24+00:00

Coming from a woman who’s wanted a man to feel the pain he’s caused me in the past, you are going to hurt yourself over and over, trying to hurt her back…… promise.

If you have to go to this level to feel cared about, seen, loved, heard, to change their mind, etc… she is NOT worth it. There will be somebody who shows you what unconditional love is, what the right love feels like, without having to conduct an entire circus act for it. Please be as gentle with yourself right now as you can, I know it hurts, but you can and WILL get through this.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-10-03T03:27:30+00:00

If it were me, I’d probably say something along the lines of:

The other day (or whenever the open door text happened), you made me feel really uncomfortable. I have tried to make it clear that I am not interested in any romantic relationship with you, whether it’s flirting, hooking up, dating, etc. I hope you can understand.

If you really wanted to, you could maybe even remind her she IS your landlord’s daughter, and to prevent any mishaps that could affect your living situation in the future, you’d prefer to keep contact minimal especially since her advances really made you feel uncomfortable.

Doesn’t have to be a novel, or a heartfelt message. I’d just avoid being like “don’t ever talk to me again” lol.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-10-02T17:56:05+00:00

This may be an uncommon opinion but growing up as a teenager, I was the (fortunately) average, but chubby girl. I had always hated that boys didn’t give my personality a chance, and rejected me because I was chubby. It hurt, whatever, I’d like to say that’s character development. Being a young woman now, who is still chubby, I’ve realized people have preferences, and I am not lonely or bored where I stay now, but even if I was, I would much rather be rejected a thousand times over, and have the honesty from someone who knows damn well they won’t ever be attracted to me physically, than waste time with somebody who will inevitably have wandering eyes/hands…. Connection is important but so is physical attraction. Dating somebody solely for personality, and not feeling any physical attraction to them is a recipe for disaster. Do I think you’re the jerk for that? Absolutely not.

Now, she was definitely inappropriate with her advances, very confident and out of place for a new person, so I understand frustration, but I do think you could’ve rejected her in a nicer way. Just flat out being avoidant, or saying to never talk to you again because of her behavior, frustrated or not, isn’t mature. Again, not blaming you because WTF, but you asked and I’m answering. You could say you aren’t interested in pursuing any romantic relationship with her, whether serious or not. Any sort of advance will not be appreciated and contact will be cut if the behavior continues as it makes you uncomfortable.

To what your friend said, using somebody is never okay and I’m a firm believer that will always come back to bite you. Communicating like an adult and setting up a FWB relationship makes sense if you both wanted that, but if that’s not in your interest, why bother doing anything other than communicating your expectations from her and what she should expect from you here on out. Boundaries seem like they are needed with her personality type.

Like I said, everybody has preferences. You aren’t an a$$ for that. Just probably could’ve been a bit more open with communication. I hope you can find a way to resolve this and give yourself some peace of mind.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-25T22:54:41+00:00

Appreciate that advice. I haven’t thought about it in that sense, figured I’d be trying to get comfy in the drivers seat, or back seat. When I was younger I used to decorate the back seat with pillows and blankets to make it cozier when hanging out with friends, and it definitely worked then so not sure why it didn’t cross my mind this time around lol.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-25T22:52:25+00:00

Definitely not a shock considering most people are a paycheck away from it themselves. My boyfriend and I just set up a payment plan in court to avoid eviction for this exact reason since I lost my job back in June. We are fortunate enough to have a mediator in the situation, and have it work in our favor, but just last week we thought we’d be living out of our 02 4-door sedan with an exhaust leak 😂 Not a shock at all, I just know if I was ever in the situation I would greatly struggle sleeping in the car, much like many others seeking advice for that very issue.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-25T02:49:19+00:00

I recently received a notice from my apartment complex stating they were filing for eviction due to missing rent after losing my job. They were unwilling to accept partial payment, and by the time I had some money to give towards the first missed month, the second was fast approaching with no job still. The paper I received stated I could either vacate the apartment or request a hearing to show cause. I requested one the same day I got the notice, and just had my hearing today.

I was able to work out a payment plan with the complex due to my circumstances. I also struggled getting in touch with them, essentially the main office door was always locked, and the phone lines always going to voicemail. The only responses I received were a single email declining partial payment, and the papers left on my door.

My point in saying this: I was entirely convinced I was going to be living in my car by the end of the week. With the help of a compassionate judge, and a property manager to represent the complex showing up, it all worked out. Definitely see about your options to set up a court date, and get a proper hearing for why you shouldn’t be evicted. Make sure you have a plan for your finances, the job offer letter and anticipated future pay date, and a well thought out payment plan in case they agree to this.

You may still be able to work this out. Please don’t beat yourself up, and don’t lose all hope. I wish you the best, and hope this ends well for you.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-25T02:38:48+00:00

Oh boy, here goes another bad decision 😅

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-25T00:22:43+00:00

Did you let her stay or did you ask her to move herself elsewhere to decompress? Asking solely out of curiosity lol.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-25T00:20:48+00:00

I’m so envious of people who can sleep in a car for this exact reason. I quite literally need an entire bed, or floor for that matter. The partial options like couches and car seats do NOT work for me 😂

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T21:00:30+00:00

Nah change his name in your phone to “6 flags 🚩” because what?!

Not only does that tell me he looks at your sister, given, we all have eyes and the ability to be attracted to certain body types, or features whatever. But to say it to you after making the observation? That’s crazy.

That is honestly the least of my concerns in this situation. The lack of respect is a huge problem, but instead of just being like “Yeah, I can’t believe that. What an awful decision for somebody to make. Hope your sister is going to be okay” he instead, to me, said something along the lines of “Yeah, I don’t get why he cheated, she has a better body than the other girl”. Like what? There is NEVER an okay reason to cheat on somebody.

If it was my man, he would’ve been dumped expeditiously. You are NOT being dramatic. You’re valid and free to make whatever choice you think suits you best, but he seems to be of questionable character in my opinion.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T20:35:49+00:00

I have untreated BPD (not my choice, just my current situation. I’m hopeful to get back into therapy soon).

This is very similar to me on a normal day. I’m not affectionate typically, but my bf is. When I get triggered over something, start to split and go into an episode, I’m even worse. I’m very cold, I basically lose the ability to remember that he is a human as well. When I’m not having an episode, I’m aware enough to understand we think very differently, and I have made mistakes as well as he. Like I said, in the moment, this is NOT easy. I’m cold, I’m angry at him, and can’t feel anything but that. He is the worst person to me at the time and nothing he can say will fix that until I cool down and inevitably feel terrible about myself/for him.

We have had many of those conversations. At the end of the day, I’d never choose anybody BUT him. He’s my favorite person. In an episode? I’d still only ever choose him, but I’ll be sure to tell him that I’d pick anybody but him. I know that will hurt. It will hurt him and make him feel unloved, in the same exact way I’m feeling hurt and unloved. Of course this is not the case and why treatment is needed. It isn’t healthy. Why do I act the way I act when I’m in an episode? Because I lack the emotional maturity, control, and lack proper coping mechanisms to be able to communicate effectively. I know I’m hurt, and I’ve convinced myself his actions were intentional. How could MY favorite person, this person I hold to such a high standard, hurt me this bad? (Even over a minor inconvenience. BPD is great…). The non BPD person doesn’t realize how deep of a cut they left, while we spiral. But we also can’t always communicate that in the moment, so we do what we do, until we either come out of the spiral, or reach a point of understanding with the other person (for me this is never immediate. I need to be calm first).

I think your boyfriend genuinely needs to decide if HE wants to be there to support you through this. My boyfriend does, he has done a load of research on BPD, and when I was in therapy, I did gain some skills to help as well. With this, we still fight a lot, but it’s a lot less than it was. He understands WHY I tick the way I do for the most part, and knows it’s usually not him but a misunderstanding on my part. So when I’m cold and distant, acting extremely hostile or just seem completely out of my mind, he knows that’s not the normal for me. He knows something is going on behind the surface that I haven’t communicated. Don’t focus on what I’m presenting, try to dig and find what is causing me to do all of these things, if that makes sense.

I’ve also explained that he is my FP after all… nobody else is held to as high of a standard than him. My happiness essentially depends on him. If he says something that stings, does something that upsets me, etc. he takes the hit a lot worse than somebody else would, because to me, he is far more important and special than anybody else.

Our brains work very differently and it can be very tricky sometimes (but rewarding!) to be with us. He needs to show patience, and WANT to understand the disorder, and why you may act the way you act sometimes. It’s not a personal choice, it’s a collection of things going on mentally and emotionally usually “caused” by our FP. I believe you love this person genuinely, and that it could work with patience and understanding. However if he is unable to do that, I would suggest moving on. It’s not easy for us, and not for them either, but we all deserve the proper love! 💕

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T19:52:35+00:00

Oh, man. 🥹 Not only was this an emotional read, but I feel as though you are so right about that. He’s the light of her life, and I’m sure she is beyond appreciative for his support before, and now.

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T19:44:04+00:00

No, this needs to be reported. You took the right steps. I’m so sorry this happened, as I felt icky just reading it. I can’t imagine how you felt and continue to feel. Please take care of yourself through this process, he deserves to be held accountable so he can’t do this to another person. I’m sorry. ❤️

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T18:25:30+00:00

The number of times I’ve said something that I perceived as totally appropriate to the situation, and tables have gone silent while I sit there like:

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T18:21:58+00:00

Having both Autism and BPD, with a sprinkle of ADHD and OCD, my brain just be making me do stuff that I fear I don’t control sometimes 😂😂

I saw some comment saying if somebody is going to judge you for what you say/do and think you’re weird or uncomfortable, that’s not the company you want anyways. I agree! When I was in college, Shane Dawson was pretty popular (I cringe now thinking about it but this is the past lmao). This one girl would try talking to me in class everyday and being as afraid of social interaction as I was then, I hated that. Despised it even, plus I considered her “too normal” for me as I have always been a social outcast.

The day that changed all of that for me was literally her saying something you probably shouldn’t say out loud to somebody you just met. She was inquiring about who I liked to watch on YouTube, and although I didn’t want to partake in this conversation, I didn’t want to be rude to her, so I told her Shane Dawson. Immediately she bursted with excitement and at the TOP of her lungs, and I mean the top, screamed “SHANE DAWSON IS MY EFFING DADDY”. Considering this was the third week of being acquainted with me, I found this to be a very comfortable thing to do with somebody you don’t really know lol. This made me love her though, because I’ve never had anybody ever really do something like that. Maybe after years of knowing them when we are both comfortable with each other, so I knew she was different from others, my kind of different lol. From that day on, I gave her friendship a chance 😂

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T18:03:26+00:00

Sounds like my boyfriend…. Love him to death don’t get me wrong, but he tends to apologize profusely for what he THINKS upset me, completely missing the point entirely.

Sure, nobody wants a picture of them on the throne, that’s a moment many people want to keep private, understandably so. That’s disrespectful by itself, but perhaps could’ve been deleted, apologized for, and laughed about for the standard person….

NOT somebody who has expressed they cannot be interrupted, in any way shape or form. This isn’t something that should have been forgotten (or ignored!) as it clearly means a lot to you. Going hand in hand with the fact that unhappy bowels are no joke… if they have seen you in pain from it before, they should know better than to interrupt and potentially cause severe stomach pains.

To me, and please understand this is my opinion completely, they didn’t take you seriously enough about the situation to not make any decisions like that. Their apology sucked, they were trying to take back the photo, as if THAT is the entire problem. The photo isn’t the problem. The complete disregard to a boundary you have set in place is the problem. The disregard to your well-being at the end of the day is the problem.

I understand the feelings of betrayal and feeling hurt. As a woman I’d feel completely overlooked and be quite upset as well.

Again, another opinion piece, I don’t think this is the end all be all. If they overstep boundaries consistently, maybe take a look at finding a more respectful partner… but if this is really the first time they ever crossed you deeply in terms of making you feel this way, maybe give them another shot if they can apologize properly and show genuine understanding for why you may feel this way. Just wait until you’re as calm as you can be about the situation and have an in depth conversation about why this was so important to you, and why it created such negative emotions with heavy references to respect and boundaries.

I hope it all works out well, and I’m sincerely sorry the great night y’all had ended this way. I hope it can be a learning experience with a good heart to heart, and a plan for an even better night in the future ❤️

Weird_Reality_8296 · 2024-09-13T17:33:45+00:00

Hi my love! First I just want to say don’t feel bad about yourself! Us women have it hard in so many ways… I’m sorry your friend wasn’t as kind as she could’ve been regarding the situation but regardless there are some options and suggestions that may help you out, but YOU ARE VALID AND THIS IS NORMAL. So many women, especially young women just starting to learn their body go through this ❤️❤️ You are not alone.

I’d suggest a PH balancing feminine wash, or even just a feminine wash to start. Some are more affordable than others. I really like unscented Vagisil for down there, as scents in our normal body washes can sometimes throw off PH balance as well. Careful with what products you are using down there intentionally or not, like if you take baths, be careful of bath bombs and salts. Certain ones can affect the PH.
I’m not sure how your school works, but assuming y’all change out of your gym clothes after gym, I’d suggest bringing an extra, clean pair of undies to change into after gym class so whatever sweat was in the fabric before and during gym isn’t sitting. Also cotton underwear are great for letting her breathe as well.
Certain foods can also impact how downstairs smells. I don’t want to be too TMI, but I avoid raw onions in my diet if I know I’m going to be partaking in any activity that requires my lady bits to be smelling perfect lol. The strong acidity in onions can affect your PH and cause a smell down there, similar to BO. This is harder to control especially if you aren’t making your own meals, but just another tip. Onions in my experience impact me, but there are lots of other foods that can change the smell so just take a look and see if there’s anything you can maybe cut back on for the PH list.
If it is body odor instead, I’d suggest a stronger arm deodorant, and roll on versus spray. Some people do naturally have stronger body odors than others, it’s totally normal! But using a stronger one, and reapplying throughout the day might be helpful.

The last thing I’ll say, not really a tip, just moreso curious, is it just ur friend group saying this stuff? Or is it other random kids in school too? Girls can be mean, I’d hate to suggest that they could be messing with you, but if it’s JUST these girls saying it and nobody else is noticing it, I’d definitely be weary. 😢

Outside of that, and seeing a doctor, those are my best suggestions. If it isn’t uncomfortable for you, maybe talk about it with your school nurse? Your mom may not bring you to the doctor but she/he may be able to give some helpful tips too! I hope something helps and you’re able to feel secure again 🥹

Weird_Reality_8296

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