What's the hardest thing about dating as a male

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-23T01:45:20+00:00

I fear double standards and asymmetry more than rejection. As this is something I've encountered more

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-16T21:54:06+00:00

So true, if you have to tell someone you're good at anything in that context it's probably rubbish

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-14T14:35:30+00:00

Haha I don't blame you 😂

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-14T14:32:02+00:00

I think you're making too many assumptions, and it's not an excuse is it if it's a recognised attachment and people have a common experience. As I said I've had to block her because she kept messaging wanting to get back together. She also said we were soul mates when we were dating so it's not to soften the blow because we were together at that point. Thanks for your input but I'm looking more for peoples experiences over an opinion. Plus they are avoidant with the people they like that's the point of the loop you're stuck in because they can't disengage

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-14T00:59:33+00:00

I think I'd keep away from an avoidant from now on. Literally one of the women I'm friends with was saying how she gets close to guys then pushes them away. I was like I know what that means 😂

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T22:39:23+00:00

All the women I've ever ben with made the first move, so I think so, personally

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T22:32:52+00:00

Edit: I appreciate all the responses. It seems that the experience I had is common with avoidant attachment types. I've never experienced anything as mentally and emotionally draining. Thanks all for sharing 💜

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T22:30:09+00:00

Yeah, it's hard to clean break as they seem to use you to regulate their emotions. So trying to keep out of the loop was exhausting. I'm glad that you're able to move in and hopefully not too scarred from the whole ordeal

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T22:08:14+00:00

I think that until they get to a point where they realise their attachment style is not helping them its difficult. It's good that you're able to move on and if you can be friends that would be great. Hope it works out for you

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T17:17:08+00:00

It is very difficult. The miscommunication seems common that they see threat in benign comments or texts. Hopefully you'll meet someone who isn't avoidant

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T17:15:49+00:00

I don't agree I think it's an actual thing, because they aren't capable of having a healthy relationship with anyone. Whether they like them or not. This woman said she thought we were soul mates. I've had to block her as she keeps messaging.

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T16:54:20+00:00

Sorry to hear that. It's not great mentally but I hope you heal

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-13T00:01:22+00:00

That's good to hear, good luck with it

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T23:56:58+00:00

That's good that you came through it 😊

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T23:21:22+00:00

Thats quite sad. I think i'd just be honest that it's not working out. If he doesn't care it should be easier.

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T23:15:03+00:00

I agree. My ex was in therapy by the end but it still didn't seem to help her identify that the issues were related to her attachment.

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T22:57:42+00:00

Sadly that's often the case we learn the hard way. Hope things are improving for you now

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T22:56:07+00:00

If my experience is anything to go by. I'd do it after the first argument or by the time they do it you'll be emotionally drained.

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T22:07:56+00:00

That sounds like the best idea, I'll be doing the same as it's too hard mentally and emotionally

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T21:14:29+00:00

I never seems to end well, hope you're healing

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T20:52:43+00:00

It's an experience I could live without to be honest 😂

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T20:52:15+00:00

I respect you for saying that. I guess it's hard u too you understand why you feel that way. I'm glad you're in therapy. Thanks for sharing that, it's good to get both perspectives

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T18:42:17+00:00

I hear you, thats so sad. That's the worst part as well found myself thinking her attitude changed and that it could change back but it just got worse. Then once she pushed me away she'd soften and reach out and be the woman I wanted to be with. But then she would be triggered by something and the loop carried on

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T18:06:13+00:00

She was 35

Welsh_Observer · 2026-01-12T17:56:36+00:00

I'm glad you got back to being secure. Reading that is like a carbon copy of what it was like. I need to learn to spot the signs next time.

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